Browsing all articles tagged with Gratitude

Uncovering and releasing unconscious beliefs

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Nov
13

This has been a week of “uncovering” and releasing unconscious beliefs that no longer serve me and   have robbed me of my peace my entire life. I cried a lot as it was painful to feel feelings that I didn’t know were there because I thought I had dealt with them.  It felt like the original wounds of “neglect and abuse” were triggered and brought to the surface to be released and healed.

I gave myself lots of “quiet” time, prayer and meditation to “go within.” I know that when I call on God for help, I am connected to the sacred part of myself. It is my belief that whatever happens in my life has been planned in the mind of God and is the perfect opportunity to give myself self- love, rather than looking outside for external validation. When I look outside for validation, it feels like an insatiable appetite that cannot ever be filled. I must give love to myself as it’s my own love and God’s love that I really desire. Nothing else will satisfy and be enough.

My ego thought system was jabbing me left and right as I got caught up in comparing myself, judging and not feeling like there was enough.  Are you as surprised as I am when your ego “shows up” unexpectedly and uninvited?  You are going along and enjoying your life, feeling loved and grateful and then BANG, you are not feeling so good and you don’t know why. I know I shouldn’t be surprised when ego shows up, but I usually am. It takes me a little time to realize what’s going on because the attack feels so REAL even though I know the truth that the ego is not real and only an illusion. Once I identify the ego thoughts, it loses its power. Are you able to recognize the tactics of your ego and the vulnerable areas of your life?

Spirit showed me that I had a choice; to stay in the “muck” of my negative ego thinking and the stories of not feeling loved, feeling judged by another’s insensitive remark or focusing on what was missing or I could RISE ABOVE it into the energy of LIGHT and LOVE that is all around me.

Message from the Holy Spirit:

“You are still looking outside of yourself for validation and to know that you are loved and lovable. This is a deep-seated pattern that is being broken now. Don’t let yourself get caught up in things that don’t matter or are unimportant. What difference does any of it make?  Rise up and only see the LOVE and BEAUTY around you, not the “perceived” problems, like what someone did or didn’t do or said or didn’t say or what’s missing. Don’t let yourself be robbed of your peace. All you need to do is BE LOVE, RECEIVE LOVE, LIVE LOVE and SEND LOVE.”

In prayer, Spirit showed me what to do when I am disturbed, disappointed, angry or hurt with someone. It is a process, and depending on the situation, it will take some time. It is not to be rushed or pushed.

FEEL YOUR FEELINGS

Don’t deny or judge yourself for the feelings you are experiencing. They are your feelings and they are not right or wrong. TO FEEL IS TO HEAL. Write your feelings in a journal. You can share them if you want with someone you love and trust and that won’t judge you. You may need to talk to the person who offended you and clarify what happened or you may be able to just let it go because you realize it’s not important and you don’t want to waste your energy. I have found it is important to feel my feelings for as long as it takes (and not what someone else thinks) to move through them and process them.

RISE ABOVE THE “MUCK”

The muck is the negative energy: worrying, judgmental, comparing, jealousy, resentments, fears and petty problems that you are experiencing.  Stop the stories in your head and the obsessing about what happened or what didn’t happen or what you want to happen. Accept what is. It’s not worth losing your peace about what someone did or didn’t do because it doesn’t serve you. How people treat you or love you has nothing to do with you or your worthiness. It’s important to not take things personally and to know it’s not about you. We have no idea what that person is suffering inside. It’s good to remember that if we had their life, we would be doing the same thing.

LET IT GO

Saying the serenity prayer is always helpful in letting go. Write a letter and bury it or rip it up. I know I have let go of something  when I don’t want to withdraw from the person that hurt me and I don’t feel any emotion or charge when I think about it.

SEND LOVE

If you are still struggling with the situation when you think about it, just repeatedly SEND LOVE. I had to SEND LOVE over and over again to the person who hurt me until it no longer bothered me. Of course, stay in an attitude of GRATITUDE for the opportunities for your soul to grow.

It helps me to remember that everything happens for a reason and is for my highest good.

 

 

 

It felt like emotional surgery

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Mar
20

The one thing I am certain about on the spiritual path is that WE ARE NEVER DONE and there is always MORE. After several decades of doing inner work, forgiveness and transformation, I was surprised when Spirit brought to the light something that needed to be healed and released in me. It felt like emotional surgery that I believe was a “divine set up.”

My life was working well; I felt peaceful, I was getting married and I have a new grandchild. I share this experience with you so you will know that you are not alone and to show you how you can free yourself from any emotional blockages that you may have that are keeping you from living your life to the fullest.

I participated in the 10 day World Summit for EFT tapping.

Emotional Freedom Techniques is tapping on “meridian points” on the body, derived from acupuncture. It can release “energy blockages” that cause “negative emotions.” EFT is a

universal healing tool that can provide impressive results for physical, emotional, and performance issues. The premise includes the understanding that the more unresolved emotional issues you can clear, the more peace and emotional freedom you will have in your life. EFT can be an ongoing process that we use to clear out the old traumas, and welcome any new challenges with a healthy, productive attitude.”

The “divine set up” happened as I listened to the EFT talk with Carol Tuttle and participated in a tapping session called, “Whose energy is it?” We are made up of energy and can be affected by others’ energies without even knowing it. It can happen with a co-worker, spouse, or a friend. It can happen while we are listening to the news or radio and all of a sudden, we are feeling discouraged or depressed and don’t know why. It could be that you picked up someone’s energy and it is not yours.

The day after I did the tapping session, I attended a beautiful “love circle” and house blessing with my 6 soul sisters. The love energy and vibration was incredibly high and everyone felt it. I think being in that beautiful love energy brought to the surface the “energy blockage” from past trauma that needed to be processed and released.

For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with comparing myself and feeling jealous when I didn’t get the attention I craved and wanted when I was a part of a woman’s group. Instead of denying, minimizing or running from my feelings, I allowed myself to go into them and embrace them. For two days, I allowed myself “solitude” and quiet time to cry, feel and write what was coming up to be processed and released. I prayed and asked my friends for help, which was humbling and vulnerable. I don’t like emotional pain, but I know that if I don’t allow myself to feel my feelings, the energy will stay stuck in my body and I will get sick. As children most of us weren’t encouraged to feel our feelings and were even criticized for being too sensitive.

I chose to be vulnerable and as honest as I could be when I shared my struggle with a friend the next day. My heart was pounding, and I felt embarrassed, stupid and like a teenager. Deep shame seemed to envelop me, as tears rolled down my cheeks. I asked myself, “Where was this shame coming from?” I have learned that when something is very strong in the present, it is often about unresolved, blocked emotional pain from the past. You may not recognize that you are feeling shame. Shame is when you feel awful about yourself because you did or said something and you can’t stop beating up on yourself for days.

I thought about the tapping session that I experienced and asked myself, “Whose energy is it?” It was like a light bulb went off and I finally got it. It became clear to me that I have carried deep shame from my mother probably all of my life. My mother was an alcoholic and because of her illness my emotional needs weren’t met. She often ignored me and disappeared for days at a time. I didn’t know if she was dead or alive and I was terrified. I watched her try to kill herself by taking pills when she was drunk. What Spirit revealed to me was that I carried deep shame inside of me because I wanted and needed my mother’s attention and love. Of course, as a little girl, I wanted her attention and love and didn’t want to be ignored. I was still looking for that love from my mother all these years later and being in a group with other women triggered me.

With this new insight of why I struggled all my life with wanting attention and love from other women and not feeling like I would ever get it, I was able to love and be compassionate with myself. I was able to release and transform the shame by acknowledging it and feeling it. The truth will set us free. The EFT exercise released the energy blockage of shame that I carried all my life and blocked me from receiving the love that I so needed from my mother, myself and the women in my life.

Is there an area in your life where you have “energy blockages” and have carried shame or any other negative emotion that needs to be transformed and released? I encourage you to ask yourself, “Whose energy is it?”

The tears flowed down my cheeks

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Mar
7

Author Melody Beattie writes, “Gratitude makes you happier. Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

Although it is my daily practice to be grateful for everything that comes into my life, whether I like it or not, I don’t always FEEL grateful. Sometimes it is a choice that I make because I know I will feel better and lighter if I practice gratitude. For example, I was driving in my car the other day and feeling kind of low as deep sadness welled up inside of me. I didn’t like how I was feeling, but I knew I needed to stay with it and allow whatever needed to be healed to come up. I know that happiness is an inside job and I will be as happy as I choose and want to be. I wanted to feel happy and not sad.

There is a delicate balance of admitting and allowing myself to feel my feelings so I can release and move through them and not staying “stuck in yuck” for longer than I need to. I had to let go of my need to control and figure out where the sadness was coming from. I needed to trust the process that it would be revealed to me in the right and perfect time. And it was!

My mood started to shift as I shouted out loud in my car, “I choose to be happy, I am happy. I am grateful.” I was definitely feeling better (not totally myself though) when I arrived at Larry’s house for dinner. Larry and I had had a “misunderstanding” the night before and I thought that could be a part of my sadness, but I wasn’t sure because the sadness I was feeling seemed to be way out of proportion to what happened with us. I knew it was “my stuff” from the past that was being triggered and coming up.

As Larry and I discussed our “misunderstanding” of the night before and each of our perceptions of what happened, the tears started to flow down my cheeks. It was like Spirit shone a light into my heart and I saw where the pain and sadness were coming from. It has been my experience that intimate relationships have a way of bringing up your “stuff” to be released and healed. Both Larry and I were triggered with “past stuff” and both experienced deep healing and transformation because of it. Thank you God because what sometimes feels like a set-back can really be a set-up by God. We were definitely set-up!

On another note, as I sat to write my blog today, I was definitely feeling gratitude for how things worked out for me this morning. Several weeks ago, while using the exercise bands at my aerobics class, I did something to my shoulder, but didn’t feel it until the next day. I have been icing it and using Arnica to help my healing. Although my shoulder was getting better, I still didn’t have full range of motion and it hurt when I moved it in a certain way.

I woke up on Friday morning and decided to go to the 9:30 a.m. aerobics class in the pool at the Fairmont Hotel. I knew water exercises were really good for healing, but I wasn’t sure what the best exercises would be. I didn’t want to re-injure it or make it worse. When I arrived, I was disappointed to see that the pool was empty and wondered if the class had been cancelled.

With that, this woman appeared before me and I heard her asking the woman sitting in the lounge chair, “Are you interested in joining the water aerobics class in the pool today?” I didn’t hear what the woman answered but I immediately piped up and said, “I am interested.” She smiled and said, “Great, we will do a class just for you.” Apparently, she had been walking around the pool and asking if anyone was interested in joining the class because she didn’t want to cancel it. She was about to leave when I “showed up.” When we got into the pool she smiled and said, “I am so glad you came, I really wanted to get in the pool today and teach a class.”

The instructor, Nancy said, “So Pat, tell me about what you need today.” I told her about what happened to my shoulder and that I was interested in exercises to strengthen my shoulder. For one hour, I had a private session with her that was totally focused on me and what I needed to do for my shoulder. My shoulder feels much better and now I know exactly what exercises to do to continue my healing.

One of the things that I love about living in Maui is how I have learned to live in the moment and follow the flow of what is before me. I followed my intuition on Friday morning to go to the water aerobics class and then had the opportunity to ask for what I wanted. Not only was I blessed to have a private lesson to focus on the best exercises for my shoulder, but the instructor, Nancy, was given the opportunity to share her gifts. A win-win for both of us.

So, all in all it’s been a great week of healing emotionally, spiritually and physically. I continue to practice gratitude, trusting everything is in perfect and divine timing.

 

 

I walked up to the man and said, “I need help”

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Sep
23

Last week I shared about some of the ways I love myself.  This week I would like to share about the ways I’ve felt loved, provided for and protected by the Divine.

I left my house early Saturday morning to facilitate the retreat/Play’dom, “Fall in Love with Your Inner Goddess.”  I planned on meeting, Kati, the co-facilitator at 8:45 a.m. to set up the space and get it ready for the women attending. I had ten minutes to spare when I noticed the big “garage sale” sign on the corner of the street. If you have read my book, you know that I am the “Yard Sale Queen” and just couldn’t resist a yard sale.  I jumped out of my car to look around the yard sale.  I found nothing interesting and walked back to my car. But, to my dismay, my car was dead as a door nail and wouldn’t start. I needed a jump start– perhaps I should not have jumped out of my car!

I looked around and noticed a man walking his dog across the street.  I walked over to him and said, “Hi, my name is Pat and I need some help.” I explained that my car was dead and I needed a ride to a house just a few blocks away. He said, “Sorry, but my wife has the car.” I am not in the habit of asking men that I don’t know for a ride, but I was desperate. I thanked him and walked back to my car.  A lady was outside on her lawn and I said to her, “I need help.”   She was so gracious and offered to drive me to my destination. But, I looked up and spotted Sally, a friend from my dancing group walking out of the yard sale. I thanked the lady and asked Sally to drive me to the house. I left my car there and off we went.  I totally forgot about my car and concentrated on the women at the retreat.

Thank you God for bringing Sally at the perfect and right time to help me when I needed it.  Thank you God that I wasn’t in the middle of nowhere and had a safe place to leave my car for the day.

The retreat was a success and the women all loved it.  We laughed, prayed, danced, sang and healed together. At the end of the day, Kati drove me back to my car to see if it would start. No, it was still dead. I called AAA and they said they would send a truck out in 40 minutes.  When the mechanic arrived and jumped my car with his cables, he said, “I’ve never seen this before, the problem may be the starter or the alternator. Lady, you better drive this car right home and bring it to your mechanic as soon as you can.”  I knew if I drove my car home, which was 30 minutes away, I would have to call AAA in the morning to have it towed to my mechanic. My mechanic lived a few minutes away from where I was.

At this point, I could hardly think straight and didn’t know what to do.  Kati said, “Why don’t you just call your mechanic and tell him what is going on.” It is now 7:00 p.m. on a Saturday night and Kati and I are hungry and exhausted. What is the likelihood of my mechanic answering the phone and being there?

To my surprise and delight, Andy answered the phone on the second ring. “Hi Andy, this is Pat, remember me, the lady that bought the 1997 Camaro.” I explained to him what was going on and I was just a few minutes away. He said, “Bring your car right over and I will look at it

Andy’s garage is attached to his home and when we arrived he was working on another car in the garage. He popped the hood of my car and said, “It just needs a new battery and I have one here that is almost brand new. Would you like me to put it in for you? I can have it done in 10 minutes.”   Of course, I said, “YES.” I was never so happy to write him a check for $100 and have a new battery put in my car.

I drove away thanking God all the way home for taking care of me in such a magnificent way.  It just all worked out perfectly from Sally picking me up and driving me to the house, to Andy being home at 7:00p.m. and having a battery there to put in my car.  I love how the Universe works when I trust and surrender.

I shared in last week’s blog about meeting the angel, Heidi, on the beach and that her message was, “Be Yourself and Let Go.”  On the morning of the retreat, Kati took her walk, and ran into Heidi walking on the beach.  They stopped and talked for a few minutes. Heidi said, “I have some new books in the trunk of my car that I want to get out into the world. Do you know of any women who would like them?”  Of course, Kati said, “Yes, I am leading a retreat later today and there will be 10 women there who would love them.”  I was amazed when Kati told me the story and how “Heidi” showed up again at the perfect and right time. The name of the book is “Awaken Your Royalty  – A playful blending of Body, Mind and Spirit –by Heidi Hohani.

I finished this part of the blog 5 days ago and KNEW there would be another “story” of God’s love to share, but I had to wait. God is faithful because the “story” was born tonight.

My friend, Kati, and I were having dinner together and catching up on the week’s happenings. As women do, we went from one subject to another. I shared with her about writing my blog and was waiting for another “story” of God’s love to unfold.  We both agreed it would happen.

My birthday is October second and Kati said, “What do you want to do for your birthday?” I said, “I have never been to Hana and would love to take a trip there.  Everybody talks about the “Road to Hana” with the beautiful waterfalls, windy roads and pools. It is definitely a must while in Maui.  Kati agreed to check around to see if we could find a place to stay for a night.

As we were chatting, a young woman walked by selling colorful leis. She stopped to greet us and told us her name was “Faith.” We talked for a few minutes and then she walked to the table behind us to greet the two women sitting there.  Kati said, “I just heard the woman sitting at that table say she lived in Hana.”  Kati and I just looked at one another and said, “Hmmmm.”

The next thing I knew I was up and walking over to the table to introduce myself to the women. “Hi, I’m Pat and I overheard you say you lived in Hana. I live in Maui Meadows and want to visit Hana for my birthday next week.  Do you know of a place we could stay?” After thinking for a minute, I was shocked when she said, “Do you want to swap houses? I am staying with my friend here tonight, but I love to come down this way when I can.”  That is how this “Divine Connection” began.  We decided to talk over coffee after dinner.

I went back to our table with a big smile on my face and said, “Kati, you are not going to believe what just happened. We have a place to stay in Hana – and it overlooks the ocean.”  We call it Maui Magic or “Ask and you shall receive.”  We needed a place to stay while in Hana and God answered the prayer. We will be “swapping houses” for 2 nights.

My new friend, Carol, shared with me that she wants to move to this area and this is perfect to stay in my ohana for 2 nights.  My friend, Linda, from Massachusetts is coming to visit me in November and Carol and I will be “swapping” homes again so I can take Linda to Hana.

I invited Carol and Sherri to see my home after we spent time getting to know one another at the restaurant. They are both women of faith and were thrilled when I gave them my book. I just never know when God is going to “show up” in my life. I do know that God is faithful. I have a feeling this is going to be a very special birthday.  And it has only just begun!

I received an email from Sherri  yesterday that read:  “Aloha.  It was “Divine Intervention” at work last night. I have been reading your book all day and thanking God for making our paths cross. I love your book and I can relate to so many things. Mahalo for taking the time to write it and gifting me a copy…..I’m so thankful to have met an AWESOME lady like you.

As I ponder God’s action and love in my life this week, I am reminded to ask for what I need, have faith, trust God in all things, and to know that I will be provided for at the right and perfect time.

“Who do you think you are going away by yourself?”

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May
28

I was still in prayer and thought about writing my blog. I said to God, “I don’t know what I am going to write about this week, please give me something inspirational to write about.” I know now that it always comes at the perfect and right time, so I wasn’t stressing.

I had just finished my prayer when the phone rang. It was my friend Donna from Massachusetts. We chatted for a while catching up and sharing our lives with one another. We were about to get off the phone when she said, “Oh, my daughter and her boyfriend broke up right before Easter and guess why they broke up?” I had no idea and said, “Why?” Donna said, “He wants to be a priest, so it is bitter sweet. Of course, she is heartbroken, but handling it the best she can. Then Donna said, “Here is the miracle. My daughter went back to college and someone knocked on her door and asked if she would be a part of the committee for the Catholic group at the college. My daughter said, “But I am Protestant.” They said, “That is ok, we want you.” She thought about it and said, “Yes, I will do it.” After that, they invited her to a 4 – day conference in San Diego, all expenses paid.Right after the breakup, Donna told her daughter, “If not this, then something better.” She said, “I never thought God would work so quickly!” While her daughter’s heart had a crack in it, God was helping to heal it nicely.I was so happy for her daughter and how God provided this opportunity for her, especially in her time of need.

As I took my walk along the ocean that afternoon, I thought about Donna’s daughter and how that opportunity just “CAME TO HER.” I love it when things come to me and I know they are from Spirit. I have had many opportunities, both big and small come to me out of nowhere. I have an example of what happened this morning when I went “yard sailing” I had an unexpected guest stay over for two nights and she slept on the couch. I found the sheets that I had bought a while ago tucked away in a suitcase. The only problem was that I only had a bottom sheet – no top sheet or pillow case. Of course, she didn’t care and we made do with what I had. Next week, I invited a friend to stay over for a couple of nights before and after her conference in Maui.

I often go “yard sailing” on Saturday mornings, but when I woke up this Saturday morning, I didn’t feel like going and decided to have a quiet morning with a walk and swim in the ocean. As I drove to the ocean later in the day, I spotted a yard sale on the way and decided to stop. I spotted the pillow case immediately and bought it for $.25 -and it was the exact same color as the bottom sheet I had at home.Thank you God, you provide for all of my needs. I went to the beach and on my way home; I stopped at another yard sale right on my street. Guess what I bought for one dollar? A top sheet and it was also the same green color as the bottom sheet and pillow case. This is a small example of how God knows our needs and provides at the perfect and right time – when we trust and believe.

I’d like to share a story from my book, “Simply a Woman of Faith” that happened about 20 years ago. God provided the exact amount of money for me to go on a vacation to Bermuda and it came to me,quite unexpectedly and miraculously.

The chapter is “God is my Travel Agent.” With the stress of my husband being unemployed and my own personal problems dealing with sexual abuse that I was working through, my body screamed out for attention. I experienced one sleepless night after another, and constant tension headaches during the day. I desperately needed peace and tranquility. I felt headed for a nervous breakdown and knew I needed to just do something for myself, away from my family responsibilities.

God speaks to me through my dreams and several times a week during that time, I dreamt about going to Bermuda. I pay attention when I have recurring dreams because God uses them to get my attention. “Okay, God, I’ll go to a travel agency and at least check it out.” I went to the travel agency and said, “I want a safe place for a woman to travel alone.” I had never gone away by myself, especially out of the country. “Yes, Bermuda is the place to go,” she answered. “In fact, we have some great deals that I would be glad to show you. I’ve traveled there myself several times and it’s safe. I have the perfect hotel for you.” I instantly fell in love with Angel’s Grotto. The picture on the brochure said it all – overlooking a pristine stretch of pink sand and Turquoise Ocean. It looked like the perfect getaway.

I thought to myself. I’ll never be able to afford this. What am I doing God? I haven’t even told my husband about it. He’s going to think I’m out of my mind, especially since his unemployment runs out and he doesn’t have a job yet. I reluctantly asked, “What does this all cost?” “Only $1,200, everything included. You can’t beat a price like that. Shall I book it?” “Well, yes,” I stammered. “But I have to check with my husband first and see if he’s okay with it. I’ll call you tomorrow.” It seemed like a good deal, but I didn’t have $1200. I didn’t even have $100. As I began to mull it over, the guilt set in and my inner critic attacked relentlessly. “Who do you think you are even thinking about going away? You’re selfish and self- centered. You don’t deserve this. You’re only thinking about yourself.”

I prayed and asked God to guide me. I asked Him to shut the door if this wasn’t His will and open it if it was. Slowly and deliberately, I changed my thinking. “I am deserving and there’s nothing to be guilty about. God is the source of everything and will provide.” When I went home, I said to my husband, “I’m thinking about going to Bermuda on vacation – by myself.” “Oh! Where are you going to get the money?”, he asked. I said, “I’m praying in the money and if God wants me to go, He/She will open the door and provide the money and if not, I won’t go.”

I prayed, waited and watched the money come in. I jumped at it when I received a $50 check from the telephone company inviting me to change carriers. I put an ad in the newspaper for a white fur coat I no longer wore. I only received one phone call inquiring about the coat. When she came and tried it on, she thought it was a bargain for $50.

A few weeks later, I ran into a neighbor while taking a walk. It surprised the heck out of me when she asked, “Pat, do you know of anyone who can help me with my ninety year old mother who just came home from the hospital? I don’t want her to be alone at night. I’m with her in the day and will prepare her evening meal.” “What exactly does the person need to do?” I asked, “I need someone to come over at five o’clock and sit with her while she has her dinner. They would help her to bed right after supper, and stay with her four hours a night during the week.” “I’m interested.” I thought I would jump out of my skin with excitement. “I can pay ten bucks an hour. Does that work for you?” “Yes, I’d be glad to help your mother. When do I start?” “Next week would be great.” The money I made quickly added up and I achieved my $1,200 goal in no time. God opened the door and provided all the money I needed to go to Bermuda.

We have a God that loves us so much and knows all of our needs, even before we know what we need. Sometimes, we ask, like I did for the money for Bermuda and other times, we are provided for without even asking. I didn’t ask for the pillow case and sheet, even though I needed them. I love the concept of open and closed doors as a way of praying and being guided. I trust if the door is closed, it was not meant to be and is for my highest good. If the door opens, I walk through with peace, ease and grace knowing I am in God’s divine will.

“Who are the players in your life that help your soul to grow?”

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May
15

Something happened this week that reminded me of how I processed conflicting feelings at the same time. It felt like a “flashback” of a very difficult time in my life with one of my children 16 years ago. This is what happened: I woke up startled in the middle of the night with banging on the front door. I quickly grabbed my robe and ran down the stairs. A parent’s worst nightmare was about to happen. A policeman was standing at the door and I can still remember the terror I felt as if it were yesterday. “Mrs. Hastings, your son was in a very bad accident and he is in Rhode Island hospital.” I blurted out, “What happened, is he okay?” “I am sorry, but we cannot give you any information. We have been trying to call you, but your phone has been busy. I found out later that it was accidentally off the hook.

I ran upstairs and woke my husband up to tell him the news. I threw on something and we were in the car racing to the hospital, following the police car. We didn’t say a word to one another and of course my mind raced to the worst scenario. When we arrived at the emergency room, the nurse escorted us into the room my son was in. I will never forget the pain in my heart to see my 16 year old son wounded and crying out in pain. A short time later, I just about fainted and couldn’t breathe. I had never had a panic attack before, but I had one that night and I was put on a stretcher outside my son’s room. My husband went back and forth between my son and me.

My son has rods in his leg and arm that are permanent from the car accident.  When I saw the pictures of the car, I realized they should not be alive and I was so grateful that they were all alive. Shortly after that, I found out that they had been to a club and had smoked pot that night. I was so angry. I remember having the same feelings at the same time – gratitude and anger.

I had the “flashback” because of a similar experience of having conflicting feelings at the same time this week. I asked myself, “How am I to process this and hold the energy of these conflicting feelings?” This is what happened. A close friend of mine shared something wonderful that happened to her and I was so excited for her. A couple of hours later, another close friend shared something that was devastating to him. I was experiencing the same thing, both the gratitude and the devastation at the same time. I asked myself, “Could I be present for both of them at the same time”? With God’s grace, I was able to be present for both of my friends.

We never know what life is going to give us, do we? One minute we are high on life and everything is going smoothly. The next minute we are experiencing a great loss and may feel devastated or betrayed. All I know for sure is that whatever is happening in my life will work out for the good because of my faith and trust in God. Everything that is happening in your life is for a reason and ultimately to grow your soul.

That same day, I received an email from my friend Karen and it put things into perspective for me and reminded me to rise above “victimhood and poor me attitude” when things don’t go the way I want them to go or when a loved one is struggling and in pain.  This is the email she sent:    

“You have chosen to walk this journey with many other souls. Each and every one of them is in your life for a reason, an experience, or to share in your life lessons and spiritual growth. What I believe is, before we even came into this lifetime we chose each and every player in this game called life. Imagine this visual. You are sitting with a council of spiritual guides and you’re talking about your life plan including what you would like to heal, experience, and create in this lifetime. Then you meet with each soul that will support you in this plan and you decide on the roles they will play in your life experience. Together you discuss and agree upon a soul’s plan that will support all involved in their life’s intentions. Every decision and choice is made from unconditional love. This includes the players in the game that agree to play the difficult roles in order to achieve the desired intentions.”

If you can see it from a higher perspective, that it is for your spiritual growth and that you have chosen this before you even came to the earth, would it be easier to go through? We all have our lessons to learn for our soul to grow. We have chosen these lessons.

People always come into your life for a reason, a season and a lifetime.

When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

~Author Unknown

No relationship or experience is ever a waste of time. If it did not bring you what you want, it taught you what you don’t want. The greatest gift we can give anyone is our presence and love. When you need encouragement, remember these things. You are stronger than you realize. Life’s inevitable adversities call forth courage and the growth of our souls. You have everything you need inside of you, including wisdom. God’s plan will unfold with perfect timing and in the perfect way. Being vulnerable and allowing other players to nurture and be present for us allows our hearts to connect in a very special way for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

“I woke up with a pit in my stomach”

Posted Posted by admin in Blog (Weekly), Blogs, Uncategorized     Comments No comments
May
4

Something happened this week that reminded me of how I processed conflicting feelings at the same time. It felt like a “flashback” of a very difficult time in my life with one of my children 16 years ago. This is what happened: I woke up startled in the middle of the night with banging on the front door. I quickly grabbed my robe and ran down the stairs. A parent’s worst nightmare was about to happen. A policeman was standing at the door and I can still remember the terror I felt as if it were yesterday. “Mrs. Hastings, your son was in a very bad accident and he is in Rhode Island hospital.” I blurted out, “What happened, is he okay?” “I am sorry, but we cannot give you any information. We have been trying to call you, but your phone has been busy. I found out later that it was accidentally off the hook.

I ran upstairs and woke my husband up to tell him the news. I threw on something and we were in the car racing to the hospital, following the police car. We didn’t say a word to one another and of course my mind raced to the worst scenario. When we arrived at the emergency room, the nurse escorted us into the room my son was in. I will never forget the pain in my heart to see my 16 year old son wounded and crying out in pain. A short time later, I just about fainted and couldn’t breathe. I had never had a panic attack before, but I had one that night and I was put on a stretcher outside my son’s room. My husband went back and forth between my son and me.

My son has rods in his leg and arm that are permanent from the car accident.  When I saw the pictures of the car, I realized they should not be alive and I was so grateful that they were all alive. Shortly after that, I found out that they had been to a club and had smoked pot that night. I was so angry. I remember having the same feelings at the same time – gratitude and anger.

I had the “flashback” because of a similar experience of having conflicting feelings at the same time this week. I asked myself, “How am I to process this and hold the energy of these conflicting feelings?” This is what happened. A close friend of mine shared something wonderful that happened to her and I was so excited for her. A couple of hours later, another close friend shared something that was devastating to him. I was experiencing the same thing, both the gratitude and the devastation at the same time. I asked myself, “Could I be present for both of them at the same time”? With God’s grace, I was able to be present for both of my friends.

We never know what life is going to give us, do we? One minute we are high on life and everything is going smoothly. The next minute we are experiencing a great loss and may feel devastated or betrayed. All I know for sure is that whatever is happening in my life will work out for the good because of my faith and trust in God. Everything that is happening in your life is for a reason and ultimately to grow your soul.

That same day, I received an email from my friend Karen and it put things into perspective for me and reminds me to rise above “victimhood and poor me attitude” when things don’t go the way I want them to go or when a loved one is struggling and in pain.  This is the email she sent:    

“You have chosen to walk this journey with many other souls. Each and every one of them is in your life for a reason, an experience, or to share in your life lessons and spiritual growth. What I believe is, before we even came into this lifetime we chose each and every player in this game called life. Imagine this visual. You are sitting with a council of spiritual guides and you’re talking about your life plan including what you would like to heal, experience, and create in this lifetime. Then you meet with each soul that will support you in this plan and you decide on the roles they will play in your life experience. Together you discuss and agree upon a soul’s plan that will support all involved in their life’s intentions. Every decision and choice is made from unconditional love. This includes the players in the game that agree to play the difficult roles in order to achieve the desired intentions.”

If you can see it from a higher perspective, that it is for your spiritual growth and that you have chosen this before you even came to the earth, would it be easier to go through? We all have our lessons to learn for our soul to grow. We have chosen these lessons.

People always come into your life for a reason, a season and a lifetime.

When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

~Author Unknown

No relationship or experience is ever a waste of time. If it did not bring you what you want, it taught you what you don’t want. The greatest gift we can give anyone is our presence and love. When you need encouragement, remember these things. You are stronger that you realize. Life’s inevitable adversities call forth courage and the growth of our souls. You have everything you need inside of you, including wisdom. God’s plan will unfold with perfect timing and in the perfect way. Being vulnerable and allowing other players to nurture and be present for us allows our hearts to connect in a very special way for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

My stuff came up & I am transformed by the renewal of my mind

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Apr
25

When my friend, Ellen, invited me to Maui for 2 weeks in November, 2010, I had no idea I would be living in Paradise 2 years later. God had a plan and I just kept saying YES to the invitation – not having any idea what it would look like or how it would happen.  Step by step, I faced my fears and moved into the mystery and the unknown.

I see today that My “PLAN” was not God’s plan and I am grateful that I had the grace to surrender, let go and allow God to lead and guide me (not without struggle, at times). Before I moved to Maui for 6 months in January 2012, while I was in Maui in November, 2011, I spoke at 2 churches and presented a workshop for women at the Senior Center.  So of course, I thought when I moved to Maui in January 2012, I would continue to do this. My “PLAN” was to continue my work as an inspirational speaker, retreat leader and spiritual coach.  I realize today that God needed to do “some work” in me and I needed to do some “letting go” before I moved forward in this way. It was not God’s timing or God’s plan.

Before I moved to Maui I was warned that all of my “stuff” would come up. I felt a little smug and thought I had worked for so many years on my stuff already, I was safe. Silly me, I should have known better because whenever we are being called to a higher level of consciousness or some big change is occurring in our lives, our stuff comes up. If I am honest, even though I don’t like it at first, I welcome my “stuff” coming up because I want to be the best I can be, so I can serve and be a vessel for God in the purest way. My stuff has come up (as I have shared in my weekly blogs) and with the grace of God, I have been transformed. I read in one of my spiritual books, “While you wait in my presence, I do my best work within you to transform you by the renewal of your mind.”

I wrote in my blog of Jan. 24, 2012 – Waiting has not been my favorite thing to do, but I have learned over the years that it is essential to my spiritual health and well-being to wait on God. I arrived in Maui 5 days ago and it is beyond words how grateful I feel for this opportunity and adventure. In prayer this morning, I became aware of “old behaviors” creeping in and robbing me of my peace. Rather than resting in the energy of BEING and trusting in the divine plan to unfold in its own time and own way, I felt tempted to control and make things happen. I thanked God for this awareness and strengthened my resolve to live in the moment and trust the divine plan. “By waiting and by calm, I shall be saved, in quiet and trust lies my strength.”

When I arrived in Maui in January 2012, I was surprised when I had “no desire” to call the churches, do workshops or coach others. “What was going on”, I wondered.  As I shared earlier, I struggled with this because this was not MY PLAN.

I wrote in my blog of March 6, 2012,  I FINALLY GOT IT and I am so grateful! It will be seven weeks since I have been in paradise and it has been quite a ride!  I am happy to report that, not only am I living in Paradise but I have found Paradise inside of me. I had a major shift in my consciousness while in prayer this week. Deep within my soul, I knew the reason I was here was to receive God’s love. It seemed so simple and yet profound. I said, “God, do you mean I don’t have to do anything?” “Yes, I want you to experience my unconditional love without having to do anything. How will you be able to receive the love from your soul mate that I have planned for you if you are unable to experience my love completely and unconditionally?” Wow, I knew God was speaking to my heart. It’s been over two weeks since I received this message and I feel an incredible freedom to enjoy the present moment, to be in the flow of the Spirit and to trust each moment and experience to unfold perfectly. I am invited to play in God’s playground and enjoy every moment. This is a gift from God with no strings attached. I don’t have to do anything to earn it.

During this time of waiting, I read a book called “Faith” by A.C. Ping. Here is what it said: “One of the most frustrating times along the spiritual path occurs when NOTHING seems to be happening.  Not only do we have lots of time to think, but at the same time people keep asking you “What’s happening?” On the surface nothing seems to be happening, but underneath a great shift is occurring. Instead of feeling frustrated, it may be that life is giving you a safe place to rest and gather your energy for the journey ahead. You may not be able to see which way to go, but if you sit patiently, have faith that life has meaning and wait until the mist clears, you may find that one day you wake up to a bright blue sky that reveals a clear path leading to an even more beautiful mountain than the one you just climbed. The temptation will be to run around in the mist searching for guidance. But this will wear you out and until you stop and rest, no further path will be revealed to you until you have the energy to attempt the next climb. Trust that although nothing seems to be happening on the surface, a whole lot is happening below the surface.”

As I write this blog, it is hard to believe that it has been 15 months since I have been living and playing in paradise. I have listened to my intuition and not attempted to further my career in any way. I have trusted that although nothing seemed to be happening on the surface, a whole lot was happening below the surface.”

A couple of months ago, I attended a talk with my friend, Jodene, and after the talk I said, “You know, something is stirring in me because I miss speaking and doing workshops. I will pray about it and ask God to open the door and bring to me what it is that I am to do – if anything.” I let it go and felt peaceful.

I met, Kati, a year ago when we were on a retreat together. I was drawn to her – she was a shining light and I loved her energy.  We exchanged emails but it wasn’t time for us YET! She lived on the other side of the island and we didn’t get together until I moved here this past September.  I had the opportunity to house- sit in Makawa, Maui before I moved into my home in Kihei.  Kati lived 2 minutes away and was friends with the women I house- sat for.  Kati and I reconnected and spent time together having fun and playing.

A couple of months ago, as Kati and I shared our spiritual journey with one another, we both felt that God was calling us to do something together. We didn’t know what it was, but we agreed to pray about it. A few weeks ago, Kati invited me to come and paint with her at her new home on the ocean and I was really excited to paint with her.  I am not sure how it happened but before we knew it, we were planning a day of healing together. It just flowed from both of us easily and effortlessly. There was no struggle, only ease and grace. Kati painted the flyer as I painted the ocean.

I am amazed and grateful how this has unfolded so easily. We are on fire and so excited to share our gifts with women. The title is “This is What I am Here For.”  Celebration of your Divine Feminine Mother Earth.  Discover inner clarity about “This is what I am here for” as Divine Feminine grounded in the arms of Mother Earth.  Join in Celebration, Meditation, Revelation, Forgiveness, Healing, Visioning, Dancing, Ritual and Laughter as your gift to Self.It will be held on May, 11, 2013.

WATCH OUT MAUI BECAUSE KATI AND I ARE COMING OUT

I had totally forgotten about this until recently. My daughter, Mary, gave me the gift of an astrology reading for Christmas. I was really surprised when he said, “Something significant would happen in my career in the month of May.” I had given up “my career” and I didn’t understand.  I wasn’t interested in my career any more; I wanted to know when I was going to meet my soul mate – more waiting on this one!  God does have a sense of humor. I don’t know what’s ahead, not even sure I want a “career”  and that is okay. I will trust God’s will and timing.

Gods timing is perfect. “My good is revealed in diving timing. I choose not to struggle with or force circumstances in my life. I know the time will be right when I feel a nudge from Spirit to move in the right direction. I pay attention to my intuition, knowing that inner wisdom and divine understanding direct me.”

    

  

“Disappointments are the hooks upon which God hangs his victories.

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Apr
8

“Disappointments are the hooks upon which God hangs his victories. There is a way to deal with disappointments that can make you a winner.  Remove the D and replace it with H. Thus, disappointment becomes “HISAPPOINTMENT.” In other words, remove the incident from the projections of your expectations and imagine that God has caused the situation to turn out this way because He has a bigger and better plan than the one you formulated. Our idea of the way things should be pales in the face of God’s vision for how good it can and will be.”  Dare to Be Yourself – Alan Cohen pg. 179

We’ve all had experiences of being disappointed when things don’t go the way we thought they were going to go.  We need to know how to work through the disappointment and not “stay stuck” or resentful because things didn’t go the way we wanted or expected them to go. It is an opportunity to trust God that whatever is happening is for our good.  I must admit that much of my disappointments have come from “I want what I want and I want it now” attitude. Can you relate?

I love HISAPPOINTMENT because whenever I’m not sure of what is the best path for me, I pray and ask God to either open or close the door. When God closes the door, I trust that there is something bigger and better for me. I have experienced closed doors at the very last minute, and it has always been for my good. This spoke to me because I was feeling very disappointed over something that happened during the week. While I was at church a few weeks ago, I spotted a very nice looking man sitting by himself in the back of the church. I wondered if he was new because I had never seen him before. As we were all walking out, I turned around and he was behind me. I introduced myself and we began talking. He just moved here from the Big Island and he said, “It is my second time here and it was suggested that I come to Unity because I am looking for this GOD THING.” That was all I needed to hear and blurted out, “Would you like to go for coffee or a walk sometime?” His face lit up and he said, “Yes, I would love to do that.” I laughed and said, “I am not usually this forward.”  I gave him my business card with my phone number on it. He said he would call me.

I was really excited and later shared with my girlfriends what happened. I described the feeling that I had when we smiled at one another. I actually had a physical sensation and felt a strong connection with him.  I felt the disappointment as the week went on that I hadn’t heard from him. I worked on letting go and trusting that it was a closed door. I wondered if he was threatened by my profession as a coach and author or worse yet, I thought perhaps he thought I wanted to get together so I could be his life coach.  Good lesson for me to learn for the future. I will not give a man my card that I am interested in!

I looked for him this past Sunday at church, but he wasn’t there. What happened next is really amazing because I received a “God wink.” I stopped to talk to one of the women before going into church. She said, “Pat, I have to tell you what happened when I worked at the new bookstore in the mall on Monday. A man came in and asked for Pat Hastings’ book, “Simply a Woman of Faith”. I said, Oh, I know Pat Hastings, but I don’t think we have her book. I was stunned and asked her, “Was his name John?” She said, “Yes, it was.”

What are the chances of me finding out that the day after we met that he went to the bookstore to find my book?  I felt grateful that I didn’t make up “this connection”  in my head and that perhaps he felt the same connection. I don’t know the reason why God closed the door (that he didn’t call) and I don’t need to know. Perhaps he found the book in another bookstore and the book will help him find this “GOD THING.” I know for sure that I am to pray for him that he finds what he is searching for. I have let go and trust that if we are meant to talk in the future, we will.

There is another opportunity in my life that I am praying about and asking God to open or close the door. I only want God’s will and it is not clear to me yet what that is.  All I know is that it is new territory for me, and that can be scary. But I am trusting divine love and guidance. It seems like God is inviting me to “receive” something that I have wanted for a long time and on a “silver platter.” It almost feels like it is too good to be true, but I know that everything that is good is true. Do I feel deserving and worthy to receive this gift from God? YES, I DO, and if God opens the door, I am going for it with gusto! I will share with you when the door is opened or closed.

I just learned a name for a behavior I once practiced in my life through reading Alan Cohen’s book, “Dare to be Yourself.” It is called a “Planaholic.” It states “our culture is obsessed with planning and much of it is inspired by fear. Heavy scheduling is a way to avoid intimacy. If we are constantly busy, we don’t have to face our feelings and deal with issues in relationships. If you are busy doing, doing, doing out of fear of being, you will never release that magnificent person who is calling to live and breathe and bring unique and precious gifts to the world.”

I am happy to say I am a recovering “Planaholic” and am so grateful for this wonderful shift in consciousness. It is amazing because today I prefer to live my day without plans. It feels so good to be in the flow, spontaneous and follow my intuition all through my day. I wake up and say, “thank you God for the miracles and surprises that will come my way today.” Course in Miracles  states,“The healed mind does not plan.” I lived in my head for such a long time and didn’t trust my intuition. Today, I trust my heart and intuition because I believe God speaks to us through our intuition. If I listened to my head and not my heart, I would not be on this sacred journey to Maui.  When I meet people and they ask me, “What brought you to Maui, I say, MY HEART.”

Since I no longer “do, do, do” and am learning to BE and feel, I am discovering more of myself and living the life of my dreams. It is truly the greatest adventure of my life since I followed my heart and moved to Maui. I am discovering the real me and finding the beauty and magnificence within. God is calling us all to walk this sacred journey of finding the love within. A Course in Miracles states “We are here to discover the blocks to our awareness of love’s presence, so we can release this and let our true loving nature shine forth in full splendor.”

Frustration, tension, anxiety, fear are the results you get when you are pushing too hard

Posted Posted by admin in Blog (Weekly), Helpful Articles     Comments No comments
Mar
23

I had a wonderful week “showing up for life” playing and being in God’s presence and grace.  I danced, swam in the ocean, painted, prayed, meditated, did yoga, walked on the beach, had ice cream, kayaked, went out to lunch with friends, watched the whales jumping out of the water, went to a luau and a ukulele concert with world renowned Jake Shimabukuro.  I enjoyed fresh herbs , oranges, limes, tomatoes, strawberries and asparagus from the garden where I am now living. WOW, I am so blessed and grateful for the grace to say “YES” knowing that I deserve to receive all that is mine by divine right. I know that the more grateful I am, I more I will attract things into my life to be grateful for. I can truly say that I don’t know anyone who is more grateful than I am.  I asked myself, “Could having a grateful attitude be the reason I am living in Maui?” We all have the choice to live in gratitude, no matter where we live or what is happening in our lives.

I attended the Unity service on Sunday with guest speaker and past minister, Mary Omwake. Her message was “Happiness, “It’s a Practice.” She shared her 21 days to a happier life” 7 steps you can take to ensure increased wellbeing. Here they are:

  1. Smile with your heart several times a day.
  2. Laugh out loud, at least twice a day – for one minute or more.
  3. Be consciously grateful at least 3 times a day, really grateful – feel it, share it, write about it.
  4. Do something for someone else, anonymously if possible, or just because you can).
  5. Notice something you did right, review the steps in your mind at least once a day for 2 minutes.
  6. Every day do something you love for 15 minutes (that is physical.)
  7. Connect with at least one person who had blessed or enriched your life every day, by phone, email or letter.

These 7 steps are not “new” concepts and I know you are practicing some of them in your daily life, as I am. I have decided to incorporate the “laughing out loud” and connecting with one person through email, letter or call who has blessed my life every day.  I have read that it takes 21 days for something to become a habit so every time I get in my car and start it up; I begin laughing out loud for at least one  minute. It really feels good. Try it, you might like it (and let me know how you feel).  In my morning prayer, I ask Spirit to guide me to whom I am to connect with and thank them for blessing me.  You might be the next person that I am thanking.

A few weeks ago, I shared a story in my blog about my friends, Jodene and Trudy, and their experience of asking and receiving and instant manifestation. Here is what happened:  After the Unity service a few weeks ago while walking out together, Jodene said, “I really want that picture hanging on the wall” and Trudy responded, “I have a signed copy of it at home and I would be happy to give it to you.”

During the service this past Sunday, I spotted Lee Shapiro in the back of the room, the artist who painted the picture and couldn’t wait to tell him the story of Jodene and Trudy’s manifestation. Of course, Jodene and Trudy were very excited to meet him also. He lives in Maui and invited us to come to his home and see his studio.  We didn’t waste any time and took him up on his offer. The next day, 4 of my girlfriends and I piled in the car and visited Lee at his home.  What a treat to be in his home and see his beautiful paintings. We found out that Lee Shapiro is a nationally renowned watercolorist who has exhibited in over 40 galleries across the U.S. Not only is Lee a famous watercolorist, but he has a passion for life that is very inspiring.

He showed us his new book, “Living in Passion” and we each bought a book to remember the day.  He has beautiful paintings and a poem that he wrote that resonated in my heart and soul. Here it is:

Living in Passion by Lee Shapiro

“I want to live my life full out, without fear or protection totally present in the moment. I want to love with infinite passion holding back nothing, unafraid of intimacy, unafraid of truth. Let love wash over me and through me as the mighty seas crash over the rocks on the shore, sending exuberant sprays of foamy waters skyward in ecstatic celebration. Do you want to dance with me, to throw caution to the wind? To lose our false sense of self and in doing, find our true selves. Let the wings of a glorious eagle carry us to heights unimagined. We might fall, but what an exhilarating ride we would have. Even the free-fall would be moments of rapture as we feel the wind rushing through our souls. Death is not the worst thing, NOT LIVING IS! When death comes, I will go unafraid, joyous in knowing that I played full out, that I did not hold back – that I felt love, sadness, fear, joy – all of it! That my life was a full-bodied symphony of feelings and experiences, played with fervor and fire, gentleness and softness. The notes will resonate in the heart of spirit, in this moment and for all time.”

These words touch my heart so deeply and it is how I am choosing to live my life. I want to love with infinite passion holding back nothing, unafraid of intimacy, unafraid of truth. I want to dance and throw caution to the wind. I want to lose my false self so I can find my true self. I want to live a life full-bodied symphony of feelings and experiences, played with fervor and fire, gentleness and softness.

Have I always lived passionately and in the moment? Absolutely not! I often pushed to make things happen. I was filled with fear and didn’t believe in myself. I looked outside for my answers.  It is so important for us to see how we have grown and celebrate who we are and how far we have come. Spirit showed me how I have grown when I read the message on March 11 in “Until Today” by Iyanla Vanzant. It talked about being “obsessive doers” working so hard and always having to have something to do. This is how I lived my life for many years.  Here is what it said:

“One reason we work so hard is that we are afraid. Few people will admit it, but most of us live in fear that we are not going to achieve our goals, receive the results we expect or fulfill our heartfelt desires. It is this fear that causes us to engage in a power struggle with God. If we really believe that you have to do it all, what do you think God is doing or can do for you? Strain, struggle, frustration, tension, anxiety, compulsion, obsession and fear are the results you get when you are pushing too hard. God, the creative force of the universe, the power over all life, doesn’t have to push to get you to what you want. As a matter of fact, if you would just ease up a bit, you might be surprised by what God will do on your behalf. Relax, sit back and give God a chance to do something for you.”

What a blessing for me to see my growth and how much better my life is now that I am not pushing and trying to make things happen. Today, I ALLOW things to happen, rather than trying to control everything, as I did for so many years because I didn’t know any better and needed healing from childhood abuse. I trust God and my intuition to guide me on a daily basis. It never fails me and I am living my life from the inside out and living in joy. Where have you grown and what do you need to celebrate about yourself today?

I encourage you to “ease up” a bit because you might be surprised by what God will do on your behalf. Relax, sit back and give God a chance to do something for you.

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Pat Hastings

Author, Inspirational Speaker, Spiritual Coach, Retreat Leader & Radio Talk Show Host

Simply A Woman of Faith
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