Do you ever say to yourself “I can’t believe this is happening to me AGAIN!” or… “How many MORE times do I have to learn this lesson?” Or, perhaps you have felt as if everything in your life was going smoothly and you were in the FLOW, which feels great, and then bang, seemingly out of nowhere, stuff happens and your life feels out of control. For me, when that happens, it’s like God has a giant flashlight that shines into my heart, which enables me to suddenly see the unconscious (and usually false) beliefs I have about myself and the world.
Recently, this happened to me. I had an intense week of inner work, forgiveness and transformation as the result of attending a Radical Forgiveness Workshop by the best- selling author, Colin Tipping. Practicing Forgiveness has been an integral part of my spiritual life for many years, and it has enabled me to forgive many significant people and experiences in my life (including myself). As a result of my own experiences, I have come to believe that while forgiveness is a gift that I give myself, it is something that all of us deserve to experience.
Through a series of synchronistic events, I was surprised when shame and guilt reared their ugly heads in my life, and after extensive prayer, meditation and journaling, I got in touch with some beliefs about myself that were buried deep within my subconscious. Once an unconscious belief is brought to light, it can be healed and transformed, and I believe learning how to do this is a very useful process to incorporate into your daily life. As the result of my inner work, God revealed to me that I was living in victim consciousness in a particular area of my life.
Victim Consciousness is when I blame and judge others and make them “wrong,” and me “right.” When I am in victim consciousness, I’m not willing to take responsibility that my soul attracted this situation or person that I’m blaming and judging, so that I can heal limiting beliefs I have that are not true about who I am. This state of victim consciousness makes me unwilling to see the divine perfection in every interaction or experience. I believe that everything happens for a reason and I create my reality by my thoughts. That means I believe that I attract people, situations into my life to heal unconscious beliefs that are still operating in my life and consequently blocking my progress and soul’s evolution.
Through God’s grace, I became willing to see the perfection in what I had attracted into my life and was willing to stop blaming and judging the players on the field. Rather than coming from a place of anger, blame and judgment, I was able to come from a place of love. I was then able to forgive myself and these other people for what I had “perceived” as their wrong doing. I recognized that I was attracting people into my life that would abuse and ignore me, because I had a limiting belief that said, “I don’t deserve to receive attention and to be treated with respect.” Once I was able to identify this belief, and shine God’s love upon it, I was given the grace to forgive myself, and those people I was angry with. Once this happened, miracles occurred.
With radical forgiveness, it isn’t even necessary to know what unconscious belief needs to be healed and transformed. What is necessary is that we be willing to see the perfection in what is happening and recognize this is an opportunity to expand our ability to love and grow. I’m so grateful for the deep healing and freedom I experienced by being willing to do the deep inner work of forgiveness.
Here are some of the common core beliefs that most of us still hold in our subconscious:
I am not good enough. I am not worthy to receive
I have to be perfect to be loved
I am unlovable and will be abandoned, rejected
I don’t deserve love. I will always be betrayed.
If you find yourself realizing that you have a belief similar to the above, you may want to practice “Radical Forgiveness” and experience the radical freedom and grace you will know when you free yourself from this darkness, and allow the light of your soul to expand.
My dream was to move to a bigger house and nicer neighborhood. For two years I searched and prayed for the perfect house, specifically one that had a finished walkout basement for my cousin to live in. I visualized my new house and what I wanted.
When I finally found the house and neighborhood that I loved, I decided to wait and see if the price would come down. This was a big mistake because it sold shortly after I saw it. I knew the next time I found what I liked, I would move quickly.
I needed this experience to motivate me to the next step. I took a picture of the home that I wanted and put it on my computer screen so I would see it everyday. I visualized myself living in it. I often drove to the neighborhood, parked my car and just walked around. I acted as if I already lived there. I even stopped a neighbor and asked if she knew of any houses for sale. A few months later, I received a phone call from my real estate agent informing me of a house that just went on the market. She said it would be perfect for me and I would love it. She was right. God works in strange ways. I lost the home that I loved only to find one that was so much better for my situation. I loved it and put a down payment on it immediately. I knew in my heart God answered my prayers.
I stepped out in faith, trusting that my house would sell quickly. I put a SOLD sign on the outside of my house (before it sold) and took a picture of it. I put the picture on my computer desk top and looked at it every day. I visualized the house selling quickly – it sold in 30 days. Even though I have lived there for over a year, I am still in awe and so grateful to God for answering my prayers.
My husband John was diagnosed with cancer in April 1998. Ten months later, after a painful struggle and many up’s and down’s he passed away at home on February 18th surrounded by his loving family. John was a prominent physician and had a strong conviction in his faith. From the time he was diagnosed until he died, he never questioned his faith, but embraced it and looked forward to his next journey. The morning of John’s death, as he took his last breath, his brother Pat said, “Fall into his arms” as I whispered “I love you.” With that he left this earth. As we waited for the funeral home to pick up his body, we went into the living room and I prayed that God would give us a sign that John was okay. My daughter reached for the spiritual
calendar and changed the date to the 18th. The reading was “I have fought the good fight and I have finished the race. I have kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7) I thanked God for the sign. Later that day, the priest came to our home to plan the readings for the funeral. Of course, the above reading was #1. My stepdaughter asked if she could do the second reading. She chose a passage from the Bible John 14:2. “My father has a place with many rooms, if that were not true, would I have told you that I am preparing a place for you?” After the funeral, at the reception, the priest handed me a small picture frame with the second reading in it. He explained to me that in his haste to come to our home after John died, he forgot to change the date to the 18th on his spiritual calendar and when he returned home and changed the date it read “My father has a house with many rooms. I stood there and wept knowing these readings came to us through God to let us know that John was on to the next journey.
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Author, Inspirational Speaker, Spiritual Coach, Retreat Leader & Radio Talk Show Host
Simply A Woman of Faith
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