Several friends have shared with me this week about important relationships that ended that were very painful. Their first response was to blame themselves and think they had done something wrong. It’s very painful to go through the process of letting go of a relationship if it was your close/best friend that you thought would be a forever friend. It took me over a year to work through the pain of losing my best friend, forgiving her, and accepting the relationship was over.
I’m sure we’ve all experienced relationships that have ended, some a slow death and others a sudden death. I’ve experienced both. For me, the sudden death of a relationship, especially when I didn’t see it coming and didn’t choose it was more painful.
I had to allow myself to go through the grief process: denial, bargaining, anger, depression, and acceptance. Even though I knew intellectually that people change, interests change, marital status’ change, and this all plays a part in going separate ways, I had to allow myself to feel my feelings.
I came across an article by Anthony Hopkins that I thought said it all.
“Let go of people who aren’t ready to love you yet! This is the hardest thing you’ll have to do in your life, and it will also be the most important thing:
Stop giving your love to those who aren’t ready to love you yet.
Stop hard conversations with people who don’t want to change.
Stop showing up for people who are indifferent to your presence.
Stop loving people who aren’t ready to love you.
I know your instincts do everything to win the good mercy of everyone around you, but it’s also the impulse that will steal your time, energy, and mental, physical, and spiritual health.
When you start manifesting yourself in your life, completely, with joy, interest, and commitment, not everyone will be ready to find you in this place of pure sincerity.
That doesn’t mean that you have to change who you are. That means you have to stop loving people who don’t want to love you yet.” ~ Anthony Hopkins
Today, as I have learned to love and appreciate myself, I have attracted relationships that are healthy, honest, loving, and open. I am living my life with presence and intention. I savor every moment as I am not promised tomorrow. I no longer change anything about myself simply because someone else cannot see, understand, or accept it. I am mindful of the traits and things that I need to work on to improve myself.
I am grateful and focus on what’s good in my life and celebrate the woman I am becoming by keeping my vibration high with love and gratitude. Today, I understand that I am not responsible for others’ feelings or actions. All I can change is myself and am responsible for my physical, mental, and spiritual health.
Are you ready to let go of people who aren’t ready to love you yet? Remember Matt Kahn’s quote: “Despite how open, peaceful, and loving you attempt to be, people can only meet you as deeply as they’ve met themselves.”
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- It’s all been planned in the mind of God
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- To know the truth of who I am
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