Being Honest with Myself, God and another Person

Posted by admin in Blog (Weekly), Blogs

Mar
1

God is good and it’s all good! Many people have commented over the years to me, “You have so much faith and courage, how did you get it?” In my divine downloads, I share not only the magical moments and how I manifest many of my dreams, but the personal challenges and opportunities for growth, especially in my journey to Maui. Faith is built and strengthened often in the darkness because that is where we learn to trust God and ourselves more deeply. My desire is that your faith be strengthened, by reading about what I do to increase my faith.

God continues to “show up” in the morning when I sit and pray and see multiple beautiful rainbows across the sky. I am provided for at yard sales and Maui’s finest boutique “Sally’s” (aka Salvation Army.) For example: In just the few weeks that I have been here, I have received a new turquoise bathing suit, Puma sneakers, curtains for my bedroom, shorts, tops, head phones, brand new water shoes for snorkeling, sexy sun dresses and the list goes on. I don’t want for anything and it is such a thrill to find exactly what I want when I need it, and all for a great price. When I get home from my various adventures, I can look out and see the whales jumping in the ocean from my condo, and I have been on 2 Whale Watches since I have been here that have been breathtaking.

As you know I love to speak and give seminars and joining Toastmasters had been a great way for me to develop my skills and make friends who share my interests. Last week my friend Marti picked me up to join her for a Toastmaster’s meeting, and of course, she wanted to know what was going on since I moved to Maui. Before I went, I had decided that I wasn’t going to share with her that I was struggling. But as I started to share, it just came out – I wasn’t doing that great. I had some low energy for a couple of days and was feeling fear, impatience and a desire to control came up that I needed to release. As I have shared in other downloads, coming to Maui will bring up all your stuff and Mother Maui will “spit you out” if you are not meant to be here! Since I was basking in paradise, this emotional place was not where I wanted to be. Instead of having fun, what was coming up to be healed seemed like work. I was feeling conflicted because I know that life is to be enjoyed and my goal is to have fun while learning my lessons.

After the meeting on the way home, Marti thanked me for my honesty and sharing what was really going on in my life. I reflected on this and why I didn’t want to share with her in the first place. I wanted to look good, not feel vulnerable and I didn’t want to be judged (not that she would have judged me.) This is what was going on in my head (which can be a bad place to be sometimes). I found myself thinking things like “God has opened the door for you to come to Maui. You have a beautiful place to live. How could you not be doing great. What’s wrong with you?” Talk about self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors. I knew I needed to change my thinking and fast!

I really appreciate it when my friends are honest with me and share their struggles. I feel honored and blessed to be there for them. I trust that they feel the same with me and want to be there for me when I need them. I strive to be authentic in all of my relationships. I am not saying to go around and be an open book to everyone you meet, but you can learn to discern and choose who is trustworthy and who has your best interests at heart. I did call my close friends, shared my struggle and asked for prayer. I know their love and prayers helped tremendously because I felt a shift inside of me.

My f faith is strengthened in many ways but the lesson for me today is to be honest with myself about what I am feeling, and also to be honest with God and another human being. And most importantly, to ask for help when I need it and allow myself to receive the love that is there for me. I am grateful for my daily lessons, for my renewed faith and for the people who love and support me on my faith walk.

After reflecting on all of this, I opened to this in prayer this morning when I picked up “Until Today” by Iyanla Vanzant

I am faith-filled and fear-free because….I know what to do without doing anything at all. You don’t have to do anything to get your good in life. You must, however, be open to receive it. For some of us receiving is much more difficult than doing, because we think we know what is required to earn our good. Earning puts you in control. Your doing is motivated by the belief that the more you do, the more you will get. Receiving means trusting that God is aware of what you need, desire and deserve. Deserving is a function of being. Being open! Being clear! Being grateful! Being focused! Being committed! Being Faithful, and being willing to receive. Being is a state of consciousness developed through unwavering faith and trust. You trust that you will always have what you need, and that is the foundation of your faith.”

And so it is! Aloha