What does it mean to be a QUEEN?
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I’m grateful for how Spirit guides me and gives me what I need every day, every moment of my life when I am willing to be QUIET and listen. I have been reflecting on what it means to be a QUEEN, especially after the man asked me, “Are you a QUEEN?” last week on my walk.
Our culture rejects our majesty and sovereignty. The truth is our sovereignty comes from no longer looking outside ourselves for validation, praise, and affirmation. I spent many years looking outside of myself to be loved and to fill the HOLE in my soul, while all along everything I needed was INSIDE of me. With the grace of God, I have moved from feeling like a victim to being co-creator of my life.
In essence, a Queen authors her own life and inspires others to do the same. A Queen owns her story but doesn’t wallow in it, but is transformed by it. A Queen is dedicated to transforming and healing her wounds and trauma. A Queen serves by showing others how to find the light and love in themselves.
Do you believe you are a QUEEN and a powerful being that can create anything you desire? I haven’t always felt or acted like a QUEEN, but I practiced “acting as if” I were a QUEEN by standing tall in my own truth as a spiritual being.
A couple of days after the above incident, a friend sent me a card and a crown for St. Patrick’s Day that said, “Wear your crown as you sit on your throne.”
The next day, I was sharing with a friend on the phone (who I had just reconnected with after 10 years) about the comment the man made about me being a QUEEN. I asked her, “What does it mean for you to be a QUEEN?” I had forgotten that my friend, Amy, wrote a book called, “SAY YES TO YOUR MAJESTY” and it had been collecting dust on my bookshelf for the past 10 years.
I immediately sat down and read the book in one sitting. She writes, “Every woman, no matter who you are or the circumstances you were born into, has a beautiful majestic QUEEN inside of you, who is longing to reign in your life. All of you have this greatness within you and it is part of your life’s purpose to say YES TO YOUR MAJESTY and be the QUEEN you were born to be. You were born into a time and place that needs your power and your light.”
As a QUEEN, I’m NOT responsible for changing the world, my family, or my friends.
· I’m responsible for changing myself and knowing the truth of who I am as a child of the DIVINE, worthy and deserving of love.
· I’m responsible to REMEMBER that I have everything I need inside of me: love, peace, joy, abundance, and happiness.
· I’m responsible for my ongoing relationship with Spirit/God/Goddess.
· I’m responsible for my peace by living in the present moment and letting go of the past and the future.
· I’m responsible to send peace and love out to the world.
· I’m responsible to stand in my POWER within and to use it wisely.
· I’m responsible to live my life fearlessly and turn my dreams into reality.
· I’m responsible to focus on what’s working, rather than what’s missing.
· I’m responsible to “show up” and learn my lessons with acceptance.
· I’m responsible to become the QUEEN and author of my own life.
· I’m responsible to know my strengths & weaknesses, as well as my shadow.
· I’m responsible to set boundaries and communicate what I need.
· I’m responsible for loving myself and knowing I am LOVE and LIGHT.
· I’m responsible for what I’m attracting into my life.
I am Embracing, Reclaiming, and Celebrating the DIVINE QUEEN I am
I am:
Trusting, Surrendered, Gentle, Relaxed, Grateful, Graceful, Positive, Humble, Generous, Honest, Accepting, Authentic, Courageous, Appreciative, Free, Flowing, Fulfilled, Passionate, Cherished, Blessed, Prosperous, Happy, Contented, Present, Intuitive, Beautiful, Hopeful, Detached, Faithful, Loving, Limitless, Brilliant, Aligned, Powerful, Heart-centered, Magnificent, Aware, Wise, Worthy, Deserving, Forgiving, Giving, and Aware of the beauty in nature, myself and others.
Will you join me and BE the QUEEN of your own life? Will you sit on your throne and know that no matter what you’re going through, or where you’re going, you are and always have been the QUEEN of your own life?
It’s time to say YES to your life, to your Majesty, and to being a QUEEN to all of the possibilities that lie ahead. It is time to listen to your heart, to your soul, step into your QUEENDOM, and be the QUEEN you were born to be.
Are you a QUEEN?
I love how we are always guided to the next right action for our highest good, whether that be to a situation, our next adventure, or a person.
I was taking my walk this week when I passed a younger woman with an older gentleman in a walker. As I always do, I said, “Hello.” The woman said, “I love your hat.” I smiled and said, “Thanks.” The older gentleman then said, “Are you a QUEEN?” (I found out later that the woman was his caregiver taking him for his daily walk.)
That’s all I needed to hear. I stopped in my tracks as if to say, “How did you know? Why did you call me a QUEEN?” I said, “Yes, I am a QUEEN. When my husband proposed to me 6 years ago, he got down on his knees and said, I am your KING, you are my QUEEN, would you like to make it legal?”
We introduced ourselves and I proceeded to tell them my STORY of how I moved to Maui by myself, knowing that I would meet my soul mate and get married!
The woman appeared stunned and said, “I have been on Maui since January and I have been praying to meet my soul mate, but I haven’t met him yet. I’m going to be 61 in May.” I said, “No worries, I was 65 when I met Larry and he was 73. We were best friends for 2 years before we became a couple. We both needed to do some inner work first.”
What an opportunity to share my faith and to encourage her to not give up on her dreams. We both had the chills and knew that it was a divine encounter and not a coincidence that we met. I shared that we had written a book called “It’s Never Too Late for Love.”
We hugged one another as we said our goodbyes. I proceeded to my car when I heard the small, still, voice of God. “Go to the car and get one of your books to give to her.” She was thrilled when I shared “God wants you to have our book.” She had tears and said, “Thank you, WOW.”
Love is always guiding us and showing us the way. Do you listen to that small, still, voice of God within or do you dismiss it because you don’t trust it? It takes practice and a commitment to listen and follow through. Miracles always happen when we trust and listen.
I woke up one morning with the words LET GO AND LET GOD. I was surprised and wondered why Spirit would put those words on my heart. I had never given much thought to what it meant to LET GOD.
It’s clear what I need to let go of: doubt, control, fear, not being good enough, ageism, personalizing, comparing, complaining, future tripping, jealousy, judgments, beliefs that no longer serve me, etc.
I asked myself, “What does it mean to LET GOD?” I ALLOW God to:
· Lead me
· Guide me
- Breathe me
· Provide for me
· Protect me
· Love me
· Live me
· Use me
· Be me
· Do me
Growing up, I referred to God as HE. God is neither male nor female, but BOTH. God is energy. Everything is energy. I started using SHE when I refer to God and it is very comforting. For example:
· SHE plans my day and shows me the way.
· SHE is my peaceful presence.
When Larry and I started dancing, I wanted to LEAD and didn’t like to FOLLOW. It was frustrating and didn’t work as we were tripping over one another. We weren’t in sync and it wasn’t a smooth, beautiful dance.
It feels the same way with Spirit. I have learned to let go of control, fixing, and planning. Instead of leading and trying to make things happen, I allow things to unfold in a DIVINE DANCE. It is easier when God is leading and I am following as I am in the flow and experience magic and miracles..
She is the one who dances me and gives me life as I Let Go and Let God.
Everything happens for a reason
Acceptance is an important part of the equation. To go deeper, I practice accepting “what is” AS IF I HAVE CHOSEN IT. When we resist “what is” we suffer needlessly. That doesn’t mean I don’t sometimes want things to be different, because I do.
We are invited to practice total surrender to “what is” and not to judge it or ask WHY it happened. Of course, there may be things I need to learn or do differently that Spirit will reveal if I am open to change and growth. Are you open to change?
Many years ago, I had an accident and was hit by a car from behind. A few weeks after that, I slipped on icy stairs coming out of the dentist’s office and had to go to the hospital by ambulance. Consequently, I have had problems with my back on and off for years.
I got to practice this week accepting “what is” when I bent over to pick up a towel from the floor and my back locked up when I tried to stand up. I was in a lot of pain and had to call Larry to help me get into bed. Pain gets our attention and is a gift!
I was really scared. I looked at him with tears running down my cheeks and said, “What would I have done if I was alone and you weren’t here to help me?” He said, “Well, you are not alone and I am here to help you.” That truth sobered me up a bit! It is the ANTICIPATION of something happening that scares me.
I was future tripping with what if this happened in the future and I was alone and couldn’t take care of myself? I hadn’t experienced that fear in my body until that moment. To heal is to feel. We need to give a voice to what we are feeling, especially if we have suppressed our feelings for years. It’s common to avoid, ignore, or push our feelings down when we don’t want to feel them.
Message from Spirit:
“Relax in my presence. Trust, surrender, and allow yourself to heal. Keep coming to me and ask for healing. Visualize your back as strong and healthy. Stop trying to figure it out and just TRUST. You don’t need fixing. Don’t judge yourself that you have done something wrong. If there is something you need to learn or do differently, I will show you.”
I am grateful the fear came to the light to be healed and transmuted. I believe that all healing is a release from fear and only our mind can produce fear. Trusting in Spirit means I am safe and never alone.
I participated in the 15th Annual Tapping Solution this week and did lots of energy clearing with EFT tapping (Emotional Freedom Tapping) to clear and release the fear. Tapping is medicine. Within a couple of days, I was feeling 90% better and able to walk and get around the house.
I walk 2 miles and count my steps (4,000) every day early in the morning for exercise. With my back out, I couldn’t do my usual walk. We have a huge lanai that overlooks the ocean. Spirit gave me the idea to dance on our lanai to zydeco music.
I love to dance and have danced my whole life. When I prayed for my soul mate, I prayed that he be spiritual and love to dance. My prayer was answered as Larry is spiritual and loves to dance, as well as being kind, loving, and patient.
Since the pandemic, Larry and I haven’t been dancing weekly. I didn’t think I really missed it until I started dancing zydeco on our lanai. OMG I am in heaven and I can’t stop dancing and smiling. It feels like I’m dancing in the Spirit as I raise my hands and send out waves of love and light to the world.
Not only am I in my joy dancing, but I’m also getting great exercise – maybe even better than just walking. I was shocked yesterday when I looked at my Fitbit and had done 9,000 steps. That is double the steps I had been doing.
As I shared in the beginning, everything happens for a reason and works out for the good. If I hadn’t hurt my back and had to do something different to get exercise, I wouldn’t have started dancing on the lanai and I would have not released the fear that was still in my body.
Do you struggle with “what ifs”?
It’s been an interesting week with ego rearing its head, especially at night when I wake up to pee as my defenses are down and I am half asleep. I usually get right back to sleep, but one night my mind was like a blender and wouldn’t shut off. In my mind, I went from one scene to the next with a lot of “what ifs.” It felt like a movie that wouldn’t stop playing. I call it the ego and some people refer to it as the inner bully, monkey mind, or inner critic. Can you relate?
The “what ifs” are called “future tripping” and they will always rob us of our peace. We are “future tripping” when we worry and fret about the future and how things will turn out. We may feel stuck and can’t make a decision to move forward and live our dreams. We are fearful and have difficult trusting ourselves and Spirit. It’s important to release our fears when they come to the light and live in the present moment. It is a waste of time and energy worrying about the future when all that is REAL is the present moment.
Once I become aware it’s my egoic voice, I pray and ask for help and say STOP. I say STOP a lot! When I’m not aware of what voice I’m listening to, I will be like a ship without a rudder in the ocean, just drifting aimlessly at the mercy of the winds. I continue to remind myself that ego is threatened by my peace and will try every tactic to rob me, like it did this week with Larry.
Larry and I have a peaceful, harmonious relationship. We appreciate one another and give one another little “love gifts” every day. We communicate well and give each other space to do what we need to do for ourselves.
Being in a relationship, whether it be with a spouse, a friend, an employee, or a child will bring up our “stuff” if we allow it to. Instead of feeling like a victim and blaming, shaming, or making someone wrong, we are given the opportunity to look at ourselves and our reactions.
Relationships are intended to bring up our “stuff” so we can evolve and become the person we are meant to be. Now more than ever, everything that has been hidden or unconscious is coming to the light to be transformed and transmuted.
Have you ever asked yourself? “Why do I have to change? Why can’t he (or she) change and keep their mouth shut and stay out of my business?” I know that I cannot change anybody, but myself.
I “reacted” and gave Larry a “look” when he innocently reminded me to not forget my earrings that I had placed on the arm of the couch. Larry is kind, patient, and gentle so I was surprised when he reacted angrily to my “look.” We were both tired and not at our best.
I felt disappointed and emotional for getting defensive and reacting to his suggestion to not forget my earrings. Sounds so childish, doesn’t it? Spirit was giving me an opportunity to look at my behavior and where it was coming from. After we hugged, I went to the room and journaled for an hour.
Like most people, I don’t like to be told what to do and I want to be right. Something inside of me rebels. Perhaps it’s my pride because I don’t like to follow instructions either. Not easy to admit, but it is the truth.
Sometimes when Larry makes a suggestion for me to do something differently; like how I drive or wash the dishes or whatever, I feel like I’m being judged or criticized, and I react.
I want to be open to suggestions and to not take things personally. I prayed and asked Spirit for help. I asked, “Was this my ego wanting to be right?”
Message from Spirit:
Yes, it is your ego “wanting to be right” because you feel judged when he reminds you to do something you know how to do yourself. Your mother criticized you and you never felt like you could do anything right in her eyes. When Larry suggests something, you react defensively and rebel.
Instead of seeing things through the egos voice, I asked myself, “Am I willing to change my thinking and not feel like I’m being criticized, judged and controlled?”
I know that when Larry suggests something, it’s from love and kindness. I have to remember it’s not my mother. It’s only a suggestion that I can take or leave. I don’t have to comment or become defensive. That feels liberating and peaceful.
With Spirit’s help and my willingness to change, our lives will continue to deepen and evolve. We are walking each other home to the truth of who we are. We are all connected and ONE.
Do you know what you want?
Do you always know what you want? How can you RECEIVE God’s gifts when you don’t ASK because you don’t know what you want? Is it easier for you to give than to receive? Many of us haven’t been taught how to receive or balance giving with receiving.
There have been many times that I didn’t know what I wanted. Many years ago, I put together a book with all of my intentions in it. One of my intentions was to be married. A few months later, I changed my mind and crossed it out. It’s perfectly ok to change our minds. I’m grateful that I got back on track because I probably wouldn’t be happily married today if I hadn’t changed my mind.
When I went out to lunch with a friend and she asked, “Where would you like to go?” I didn’t know what I wanted and would say, “I don’t care, where would you like to go?” When I was making a difficult decision, I would ask friends, “What would you do if you were me?” Of course, there is nothing wrong with getting support and asking others’ their opinions, especially people you respect and trust.
The bottom line is that I didn’t know what I wanted or trusted my answers were within. I looked OUTSIDE for my answers. When we are always busy and rushing around, we may not take the time to go within to pray, meditate, ask for guidance to figure out what we want.
I recently read that not knowing what we want is a SYMPTOM of not knowing how to RECEIVE. Here are some beliefs why we may have difficulty receiving:
- We think the needs of others are more important than ours.
- We spend our energy investing in others.
- We think a spiritual person thinks of others more than themselves.
- We don’t have enough “guilt free” practice in wanting something.
- We are afraid of appearing selfish, needy, or greedy.
- We take care of others needs at the expense of ourselves.
When I was in the middle of dealing with the trauma of clergy sexual abuse many years ago, I needed to get away by myself and process the trauma that was coming up. I had never gone away by myself so it was a big deal as to where to go. All I knew was that I wanted to be alone and wanted sunshine.
I had to work through all of the excuses as to why I couldn’t go like, “I don’t deserve or am worthy to go away by myself, I don’t have the money, what will my husband think?”
Something deep in my soul was calling me and by the grace of God, I listened and decided to go to Bermuda by myself. When I told my husband what I wanted to do he asked, “Where are you going to get the money?” I said, “I’m going to pray it in.” My faith was strong and I knew that if it was meant to be, it would be and if not, the door would be closed.
Money “showed up” miraculously within a very short time. I met a neighbor while taking my walk (whom I hardly knew) and she asked, “Do you know of anyone that can help my mother for 2 hours a night and put her to bed as she just came home from the hospital? I will pay $10 an hour and it will be 7 nights a week.” I was thrilled and said, “Yes, I would be happy to help your mom, when do I start?” In a short time, I had all the money I needed.
Spirit had a different “plan” for my trip to Bermuda than I did. I was expecting sunshine, quiet and peace at Angels Grotto where I stayed. Instead, the rain Gods showed up and it poured for 3 days in a row. I had rented a motorbike and it sat in the driveway getting wet.
I was so excited when the sunshine finally came out and I could get out and explore the island on my motorbike. I found a beautiful restaurant on the ocean and I was in my glory until I looked up at the black clouds surrounding us. I was a couple of hours away from Angels Grotto and I knew I needed to move fast before the rain started again, especially since I didn’t have any rain gear.
As I drove across the causeway, the skies opened up and the rain came down in buckets. I had never been so scared in all my life, sobbing as cars sped by me. I spotted a covered bus station just up ahead. When I got there, I threw my bike down and screamed at God and it wasn’t pretty. I had no idea how much ANGER was inside of me that I had suppressed until this happened. When the rain finally stopped, I was able to drive back. I was so grateful to be alive and that I didn’t get killed.
The greatest gift we can give our children
I’m sure we’ve all experienced this at one time or another. Something happens that upsets or stresses us and we think “I dealt with that mother/father/boss/husband issue years ago. Why is it coming up now?”
Healing is like an onion. We need to keep peeling layer by layer until we get to the core of our wounds. It has taken me over 40 years of deep inner work to heal my past. We need patience and perseverance to set ourselves free and become the best version of ourselves.
In the past, I would get upset whenever I was triggered AGAIN. Today, I see it differently. When I’m triggered it is because there is more healing needed, whether it be self-love, forgiveness, self-compassion, or letting go of hurt and resentment.
Instead of feeling disappointed, discouraged, beating up on myself, and taking things personally when I’m triggered, I welcome it and am grateful that my body is letting me know I still have more healing to do.
How do we know we are healing?
- We are triggered less by what others say, do or don’t do.
- We don’t take things personally.
- We (energetically) thank the person for triggering us.
- We don’t need answers of WHY & HOW something happened.
- We are able to laugh at ourselves, rather than taking things so seriously.
- We trust every experience is meant for us to grow and evolve.
- We are grateful & accept what is, rather than trying to change someone.
- We judge others less, as we know when we judge others, we judge ourselves.
- We practice living in the MOMENT, rather than the past or the future.
- We forgive ourselves and others.
- We enjoy being quiet and resting in Spirit, rather than rushing & pushing.
In the last few months, Spirit has allowed events to happen to show me how I have healed and transformed. In the past, these things could have devastated and triggered me big time.
Family members and those close to us will often trigger our deepest wounds. Living on Maui is like living heaven on earth. The only challenge is living 5000 miles away from my children and grandchildren, especially at holidays or special occasions like birthdays and gatherings.
I call and sing to my children on their birthdays. They always call me on holidays and my birthday. It’s fun to celebrate one another’s birthdays on Zoom or Facetime. It makes me feel a part of their lives.
I received calls from 3 of my 4 children on my birthday in October. It was getting late, and I was surprised that I hadn’t heard from my daughter. Instead of personalizing it and feeling like I didn’t matter, I called her and sang happy birthday to myself. She felt terrible that she forgot to call me, as she had never done that before.
I laughed and reassured her it was meant to happen to show me how I wasn’t triggered like I have been in the past and that I was healing my past.
I felt grateful that 3 of my children called to wish us a Merry Christmas. One of my sons didn’t call by the time I went to bed and I was FINE. It may not sound like a big deal to some of you, but I’m triggered when I “perceive” that I’m being ignored. I understand it comes from my mother wound of being ignored as a child.
My son called the first thing the next morning to wish us a Merry Christmas. I didn’t ask WHY he didn’t call or confront him for forgetting to call. The important thing is that I felt loved and FREE. I didn’t have any need to guilt him.
I received the greatest gift this week from one of my children. I had been helping them process their feelings around a difficult situation they were involved in. I affirmed them for how loving, respectful, and kind they were. My heart cracked open when they said, “Mom, I learned it from watching you be loving, respectful, and kind.” For so many years, I believed the lies that I wasn’t a “good enough” mother.
The greatest gift we can give our children is our own healing. My heart is bursting with joy and gratitude to Spirit that I was willing to do the inner work of forgiveness, letting go and healing myself.
I felt shamed because I needed attention
What are the messages you received growing up in your childhood home, school, or church? Were they positive or negative? Did they build you up or tear you down? Did they encourage you or discourage you from following your dreams?
I remember my mother saying, “Don’t be conceited and you are cold, just like your father.” As a young child, I didn’t understand what it meant to be conceited or cold like my father. It didn’t feel good and I hated it when she said it. It was very confusing because I loved my father and deep down, I knew I wasn’t cold.
The priest that sexually abused me when I was 12 years old called me a “gold digger.” OMG, I had no idea what that meant, but I knew it wasn’t good. How cruel that was to say to a young girl who was impressionable, trusting, and vulnerable.
These messages from authority figures in my life that I trusted and loved robbed me for much of my life. They robbed me of the truth of who I am and consequently kept me small, confused, and embarrassed whenever I was complimented.
I was “shamed” because I needed attention and to be loved, seen, and heard. It is what we all need and deserve. The messages I received were that I was wrong for wanting love and attention and asking for what I needed, therefore causing trauma in my body.
Although my parents did the best they could, they were incapable (because of their alcoholism) of giving me the love that I needed and deserved. I was needy and worked very hard to be seen and heard in school. I was voted most popular in a class of 900. I was the queen of the prom and president of the sorority.
All my “striving” to be seen and heard was a cry for love. I didn’t know how to love myself so I looked outside for love. It was like I was saying, “please see me, love me, and accept me.” Although I appreciate and enjoy when I have received a compliment about my growth and transformation, I have felt embarrassed and want to say, ok that’s enough.
Consequently, I became an overachiever, over giver, and people pleaser so I would be loved back. I realize today that my love was conditional. If you loved me, I loved you back. These were learned behaviors to compensate for my low self-worth, trauma, and not feeling good enough. Can you relate?
As I worked on a dream I had this week, I asked myself, “Are these old childhood messages unconsciously still playing in my head? And if so, how?
Message from Spirit:
“I gave you this dream to free you from the message that you were conceited. It is not true. You are not conceited and never have been. You were only trying to get the love you needed from your parents who were unavailable because of their own lack of self-love. You have tried to hide your light because you didn’t want to feel guilty and embarrassed of the truth of who you are. You are love and light.“
Over the years people close to me have said, “You don’t know what you have or who you really are.” Of course, I didn’t want anyone to think I was conceited, a gold digger, or cold so I hid my light and gifts, even from myself.
Today, I am embracing and “receiving” when others see my light and love. Just this week, a woman I didn’t know said, “You are glowing and another woman said, you are radiant and an angel.” My friend and husband gifted me with a beautiful gift and a poem from Maryann Williamson. They said “This is Pat in words, her essence, and colors.
I will not and cannot hide my light anymore. The world needs my light and the world needs your light. With the grace of God and my willingness to go deep and forgive, I have transcended the messages and old victim stories of who I am and where I came from.
The truth is I AM LOVE. I AM LIGHT. I am perfect and whole and made in the image of God. I AM DIVINE and ONE with Spirit. I AM expanding, evolving, flowing, glowing, shining, connecting, sparkling, allowing, and surrendering.
Will you accept and embrace that YOU ARE LOVE & YOU ARE LIGHT?
I encourage you to think about the messages you received growing up and ask Spirit if they are still playing in your mind.
Let Go and Let God
Many of us have heard the phrase “Let go and let God.” I was taking my walk and thought about what it means to me and how “I let go and let God.”
Why is it so hard to let go? Why do we struggle so much and cause ourselves needless suffering? I think it’s because we don’t trust that it’s safe to let go. We hold on to false beliefs and illusions that we are alone, separate from others and God, and we need to protect and defend ourselves. We believe we can control outcomes if we push and work hard to get what we want.
There are some behaviors and patterns we are invited to LET GO of if we want to be peaceful.
*Control *fear *complaining *comparing *shoulds *competition *resentments *judgements *blame *guilt *discouragement *feeling responsible for others’ *shame *people pleasing *anger *unforgiveness *jealousy *doubt *self-hatred *self-sabotage *low self-esteem *taking things personally *fixing others *having to be right *attached to outcomes *codependency *doing rather than being *addictions *stress *defensiveness *dishonesty *worry *anxiety *not enough *pride *lack.
Some of these behaviors or egoic patterns require letting go many times as they have been with us for a long time and feel like our friends. Our ego is threatened by peace and will try to destroy our peace as we grow deeper in consciousness and the truth of who we are.
Do you have to wait until you are at the end of your rope, feeling despair, and confusion before you “let go and let God” and ask for help?
Many years ago, my ex-husband was out of work for a year and we had 4 children under the age of 10. There was a great job opportunity that we were sure he was going to be offered. We were devastated when he wasn’t offered the job. I remember sitting in our bedroom with the lights off, sobbing, drinking a glass of wine, and eating chocolate. I was angry and couldn’t understand why God hadn’t answered our prayers. There was nothing else I could do, but LET GO. It was shortly after that experience that he was offered another job that changed our whole lives.
What happens when “I let go and let God?” I feel peaceful and trust everything will work out because God will show me the way. I know God has my back when I trust and surrender. When I let go, miracles happen and doors open almost miraculously. Relationships are healed and there is harmony, contentment, happiness, and joy. It’s like I’m getting out of the driver’s seat and saying, OK Spirit, drive the car, I surrender, show me the way.
What does it mean to “Let God”? It means to “show up” daily and listen to the small, still voice of God within. When I’m so busy, rushing around and trying to make things happen, I don’t hear the voice within. Do you hear the voice of God within?
To “Let God” means I’m saying:
· Guide me, lead me, show me the way
· Heal me
· Use me as your instrument and Vessel of Love
- I ACCEPT “what is”
- I trust and surrender
I was taught and conditioned to call God, Higher Power, Source, Spirit, or Universe “HE”. It doesn’t matter what we call the Power greater than ourselves, it just matters that we BELIEVE in a Power greater than ourselves.
I know that God is neither male nor female. God is Love energy. I have started using SHE in my affirmations; it is so comforting and peaceful. She plans my day and shows me the way.
Is there anything I’ve missed that you need to let go of to be the best version of yourself and end your suffering? It’s your choice. I encourage you to prayerfully look at the above list and identify what you are willing to let go of. It is a decision to let go of what no longer serves you and never has. If not NOW, WHEN?
Are you waiting for an apology?
Do you need an apology to forgive someone who has abused or hurt you? Unfortunately, you may be waiting your whole life for that apology.
Many of us spend our whole lives waiting for someone to apologize or take responsibility for their actions and how they hurt us before we decide to let go and forgive.
I’m not saying that it’s wrong to want someone to take responsibility and apologize for their actions. It’s important to set boundaries and not allow others to treat us poorly. It’s easier to forgive when someone does take responsibility and apologizes for their behavior. But what if they are not willing to apologize or they are deceased? Where does that leave us?
The problem with that scenario is that we have put someone else in charge of how and when we heal. If we truly want to break a cycle and heal, we have to let go of what the other person did or didn’t do.
Forgiveness is for me, not the other person. To forgive is to set a prisoner free only to discover that the prisoner is ME. I’m not condoning another’s actions; I am forgiving because I want to set myself FREE.
I have always believed in forgiveness. Forgiveness is a process, sometimes quick and easy and sometimes long and painful. It took me 3 years to forgive my father who sexually abused me when I was a young girl.
I wanted to forgive him right away when I went into therapy as memories started to surface about the sexual abuse. I wanted to get it over with and didn’t want to feel the pain deep inside.
I’m grateful that I had a wise therapist who guided me, and held my hand and heart as I experienced deep grief, anger, betrayal, and sadness before I reached acceptance and forgiveness. With the grace of God and my willingness to move on, I forgave my father and didn’t need or receive an apology. That is the grace of God for sure. What was important was that I was free of resentment, blame, anger, and feeling like a victim.
Again, forgiveness is for me and not the person I’m forgiving. I forgave a teacher and a priest who sexually abused me in grade school. I never received an apology from them either.
Although I never received an acknowledgment for the abuse from the priest, I sued the Catholic church and won. It felt empowering to stand up and speak my truth and be heard.
Is there anyone in your life who you are having difficulty forgiving? Give yourself the time you need and don’t forgive prematurely because you don’t want to feel the pain and grief inside. Ask Spirit to help you forgive and show you the way. When you are unable or unwilling to forgive, you will not find lasting peace and happiness.
It’s not only others who hurt us that we are invited to forgive. But what about you? Where have you hurt yourself and need to forgive yourself? I had to forgive myself for staying in a marriage for 30 years because I didn’t believe in myself and didn’t think I could make it on my own.
I forgave myself for “self-induced” suffering for years of taking things personally and feeling responsible for others’ well- being, instead of my own. In my head, I knew that what others did or didn’t do was about them and not me.
It has finally reached my heart and it feels so good to set myself free from beliefs that never served me. What others do or don’t do, especially family members, is none of my business. It’s their journey and they have their lessons to learn, as I have mine.
I’ve been meditating on this Hawaiian method of apology and forgiveness for years. Ho’oponopono is a centuries-old native Hawaiian method of apology and forgiveness. The four steps in ho’oponopono are remorse, forgiveness, gratitude, and love. Ho’oponopono can be used in person, if the relationship seems irreparable, or if the other person has passed away. It offers methods of creating positive effects in everyday life. This simple four-step system encourages us to focus on difficult conflicts within personal relationships and heal the past. By addressing these issues, owning one’s feelings, and accepting unconditional love, unhealthy situations transform into favorable experiences
FOrgiveness is for ME
Do you need an apology to forgive someone who has abused or hurt you? Unfortunately, you may be waiting your whole life for that apology.
Many of us spend our whole lives waiting for someone to apologize or take responsibility for their actions and how they hurt us before we decide to let go and forgive.
I’m not saying that it’s wrong to want someone to take responsibility and apologize for their actions. It’s important to set boundaries and not allow others to treat us poorly. It’s easier to forgive when someone does take responsibility and apologizes for their behavior. But what if they are not willing to apologize or they are deceased? Where does that leave us?
The problem with that scenario is that we have put someone else in charge of how and when we heal. If we truly want to break a cycle and heal, we have to let go of what the other person did or didn’t do.
Forgiveness is for me, not the other person. To forgive is to set a prisoner free only to discover that the prisoner is ME. I’m not condoning another’s actions; I am forgiving because I want to set myself FREE.
I have always believed in forgiveness. Forgiveness is a process, sometimes quick and easy and sometimes long and painful. It took me 3 years to forgive my father who sexually abused me when I was a young girl.
I wanted to forgive him right away when I went into therapy as memories started to surface about the sexual abuse. I wanted to get it over with and didn’t want to feel the pain deep inside.
I’m grateful that I had a wise therapist who guided me, and held my hand and heart as I experienced deep grief, anger, betrayal, and sadness before I reached acceptance and forgiveness. With the grace of God and my willingness to move on, I forgave my father and didn’t need or receive an apology. That is the grace of God for sure. What was important was that I was free of resentment, blame, anger, and feeling like a victim.
Again, forgiveness is for me and not the person I’m forgiving. I forgave a teacher and a priest who sexually abused me in grade school. I never received an apology from them either.
Although I never received an acknowledgment for the abuse from the priest, I sued the Catholic church and won. It felt empowering to stand up and speak my truth and be heard.
Is there anyone in your life who you are having difficulty forgiving? Give yourself the time you need and don’t forgive prematurely because you don’t want to feel the pain and grief inside. Ask Spirit to help you forgive and show you the way. When you are unable or unwilling to forgive, you will not find lasting peace and happiness.
It’s not only others who hurt us that we are invited to forgive. But what about you? Where have you hurt yourself and need to forgive yourself? I had to forgive myself for staying in a marriage for 30 years because I didn’t believe in myself and didn’t think I could make it on my own.
I forgave myself for “self-induced” suffering for years of taking things personally and feeling responsible for others’ well- being, instead of my own. In my head, I knew that what others did or didn’t do was about them and not me.
It has finally reached my heart and it feels so good to set myself free from beliefs that never served me. What others do or don’t do, especially family members, is none of my business. It’s their journey and they have their lessons to learn, as I have mine.
I’ve been meditating on this Hawaiian method of apology and forgiveness for years. Ho’oponopono is a centuries-old native Hawaiian method of apology and forgiveness. The four steps in ho’oponopono are remorse, forgiveness, gratitude, and love. Ho’oponopono can be used in person, if the relationship seems irreparable, or if the other person has passed away. It offers methods of creating positive effects in everyday life. This simple four-step system encourages us to focus on difficult conflicts within personal relationships and heal the past. By addressing these issues, owning one’s feelings, and accepting unconditional love, unhealthy situations transform into favorable experiences
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