I gave my power away

Posted by admin in Blog (Weekly), Blogs

Mar
24

I’m responsible for my thoughts, actions, reactions, and happiness. I have learned to focus on myself and go within and change my perspective, if necessary, rather than judge, react or blame someone when I feel hurt or angry. For many years, my ego ran the show and I gave my power away to others and lost my peace when I felt angry or hurt.

The Universe is always giving us opportunities to grow, expand and change. Even when I’m in the middle of an unpleasant or stressful situation (that doesn’t feel like an opportunity), I know that what’s happening is for my highest good.

It’s all about TRUST and living in gratitude. It’s a choice to TRUST that everything is happening for a reason and that Spirit has my back. It is my belief that I’m ALWAYS being guided and protected 24/7.

I’m very proud of myself that I didn’t “react” to a remark a friend made this week to me. Instead of becoming defensive like I did for many years, I calmly spoke my truth, set my boundaries and was quiet. Although I felt angry by my friend’s remark, I wasn’t triggered because of the inner work and releasing I’ve done the past several years. That is good news!

I have learned the importance of allowing myself to feel all of my feeling rather than ignore them and push them down or eat or stay busy over them. What do you do to avoid your feelings?

Anger was not a feeling that I was familiar with growing up. It was communicated to me that sweet little girls don’t get angry. When I started my recovery journey over 40 years ago, I had no idea how much anger was inside of me that I had suppressed.

In my family of origin, I was allowed to feel hurt, but not angry. My best friend, who was also a “people pleaser” felt her anger first, but had a difficult time feeling her hurt. How about you? What do you feel first?

My therapist informed me that when you are a “people pleaser” there is a good chance that you are full of anger because when you focus on others, at the expense of yourself, your needs aren’t met.

Slowly the frozen feelings of anger inside of me melted as I felt safe to feel all of my feelings. Today, I have no problem feeling my anger and have learned to do it appropriately. I know HOW and WHEN to SPEAK UP or SHUT UP.

As I shared, I felt angry by my friend’s remark. I went home and journaled my anger and then asked Spirit for help. Instead of reacting and lashing out at my friend and telling her that I thought her remark was inappropriate and rude, I prayed and asked Spirit for guidance. I was guided to not speak up, but to forgive and let go. When I saw my friend the next day, something had shifted inside of me as the anger was gone and all I felt was LOVE. That’s a miracle to me.

When we ask Spirit to guide us in all our actions and affairs, we can’t go wrong. It takes willingness, humility, grace, and practice to ask Spirit for help. We have been conditioned to do things on our own and may feel weak asking for help. The situation with my friend would have gone differently if I had REACTED and hadn’t worked through my anger first.

Remember we are all responsible for our thoughts, actions, reactions and happiness. Change your thinking, change your life.