Respect is important

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Whether it be in a partnership, marriage, friendship, business, or parent-child relationship, it is crucial to have RESPECT as the foundation. I may not agree with someone’s actions and may even be concerned that it is not healthy for them, but I am learning to TRUST it’s their journey, and they are doing the best they can, and will learn their lessons in their own time and own way. If I want peace in my life, I practice detaching with love. I choose to RESPECT AND TRUST others’ decisions and where they are at. I want that same RESPECT in my relationships.

I was really touched by a text my son, Tim, sent to the family after his visit to Rhode Island a few weeks ago:

“Every time I visit, I realize how grateful I am for each of you. I remember how the vast majority of people do not have what we share. Especially since the pandemic. I’ve had 2 close friends be ostracized from their families because of different opinions on the vaccine. We may not agree on everything, but we can agree that we love one another and that is enough.”

What Tim is talking about is RESPECTING ONE ANOTHER even when we disagree on things. It truly saddens my heart that the pandemic and getting the vaccine or not getting it has caused so much division in families and friendships. Rather than judging and making others wrong for their decisions, I believe the world needs more respect, compassion, and kindness. 

I asked myself some interesting questions:

·        If I didn’t respect myself, can I expect others to respect me?

·        Can I respect others if I don’t respect myself? 

If I don’t respect myself and what’s important to me, others will not respect me and I don’t think we can respect others when we don’t respect ourselves. It all begins with Me.

Growing up in a dysfunctional family, like so many of us, I didn’t know anything about self-love, self-respect, or self-appreciation.  It’s taken me years to learn and practice the importance of self-love, self-respect, and self-appreciation. My daily affirmation is “I am honored, respected, valued, appreciated, and loved.” 

What I have learned is that I teach people how to treat me. When I don’t set healthy boundaries and say enough is enough to inappropriate behaviors, I continue to allow myself to be disrespected. It takes courage to say NO MORE when we feel disrespected by another’s behaviors and actions.

I felt disrespected and angry this week when I spoke up to a friend about something that was important to me. I journaled and allowed myself to feel all of my feelings. I sensed my anger was out of proportion to the incident that happened.

As I meditated and prayed, Spirit brought to mind something that happened to me at 11 years old when I stayed after school to help the teacher mark papers. As I was leaving the classroom, he pushed me against the wall and tried to kiss me and touch my breasts. I never went back after school again. Instead of telling my parents or the school authorities, I buried it.  

I allowed myself to feel the anger of being abused and not respected so many years ago. I didn’t know any better at the time and didn’t respect myself. I didn’t realize that I had pushed the anger down until the incident with a friend happened this week. After doing my anger work and releasing it, I felt freer, lighter, and transformed. Everything is coming into the LIGHT to be healed and transformed.

It is called the Ascension process and a “spiritual awakening which moves us into a higher level of consciousness. The more we grow spiritually, the more our energy increases, and the more we will understand how perfectly everything is orchestrated. We are becoming more heart centered, compassionate and creative, and is also opening to greater cosmic consciousness.  

How about you? Do you feel loved, respected, appreciated, and valued in all of your relationships? If not, why not? Remember, it all starts with YOU. If you want others to respect you, you must love, appreciate and respect yourself first.

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Pat Hastings

Author, Inspirational Speaker, Spiritual Coach, Retreat Leader & Radio Talk Show Host

Simply A Woman of Faith
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