This week is the 10th anniversary of moving to Maui. It’s hard to believe I have been living here for 10 years and so much has changed; I’m a married woman, live in a beautiful home overlooking the ocean, and we just published our book together. I could never have imagined what my life looks like today.
I came across a magazine advertisement this week that was written 10 years ago, the week before I moved to Maui. It said, “Join Pat Hastings on Norwegian Spirit Holistic Cruise – Pat was selected to be one of the speakers on the Holistic Cruise to Mayan Country. During the cruise, Hastings will present “How to Say No to Others and Yes to Yourself.” I met so many wonderful people and have many fond memories of the fun we had.
There was a time when I didn’t say no to others because I thought it was selfish. I put others first and me last. I looked to others for my answers, rather than go within. If I hadn’t learned this skill of saying no and how to love myself, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I have no problem saying no today and speaking up if something doesn’t feel right.
I believe keeping our vibration high (in gratitude, peace, and love) at this time of such “unrest” is crucial for ourselves and the world. We are given the opportunity to choose love or fear in all areas of our lives. It’s not that we don’t feel our feelings and do a spiritual bypass. We allow ourselves to feel sad, angry, disappointed, or fearful. We feel our feelings and then let them go and trust in the divine plan for our lives. There is nothing we can do about what is happening on the “OUTSIDE” of us. All we can control is what is happening “INSIDE” of us.
We keep our vibration high through self-care and self-love. If we don’t love ourselves, we will not be able to love others. Below are ways to practice self-care. I invite you to look it over and pick 1 or 2 to practice. Ask Spirit for help and to show you which area is most important for your growth and highest good.
I see my growth and where I’ve grown with saying no, asking for what I want, setting boundaries, and spending time alone. Spirit is inviting me to practice “stepping back.”
What do I mean by practicing “stepping back?”
- I give my opinion ONLY when asked.
- I don’t judge others, especially when they have a different perspective or behavior (mask-no mask, vaccine-no vaccine, etc.) I may not like or approve of another’s choices and behaviors, but it is their journey, not mine.
- I don’t gossip, especially in the name of love.
- I don’t complain, but “accept what is” and focus on what I do have.
For example, I was taking my walk on the path today. I started to judge and tell myself a “story” about someone who didn’t stop to talk to me (especially when I see them talking to others.) When I became aware I was judging the person and telling myself a “story” I stopped myself and chose love instead.
It’s impossible to “step back” and not judge or complain on my own power. I know I will slip many times. The key is to become aware when I’m judging or complaining and forgive myself and ask Spirit for help. It motivates me to realize that when I judge another person, I am judging MYSELF because we are ONE and connected.
I made an important decision this week without consulting Larry first. When I shared it with him, he asked, “Do you want my opinion?” I looked at him and said, “Thank you, but I’m not asking for your opinion.” It felt so empowering to speak my truth and to trust my own counsel and God’s guidance within. I’m grateful he wasn’t defensive and has learned he doesn’t have to fix me.
Let us remember the truth of who we are and who God is in our lives. This is the “Great Awakening” and it will be ugly at times as darkness comes into the light. You and I are the light in the darkness and are invited to shine our lights to show the way for others. We are safe and protected and our faith will carry us through the storms.
I love how Spirit works in my life and guides me for my highest good & for the good of all involved. For the past 3 years when I returned to Rhode Island I’ve led a women’s retreat at my daughter, Mary’s, farm in W. Greenwich. The retreats have been very powerful and I looked forward to seeing all of the women each year. It was like a big reunion sharing with one another about how God answered our prayers.
As I started to prepare the retreat for this year I felt stressed thinking about marketing it and trying to get it all together while here in Maui. As I prayed about it and sat with it, I decided not to do it because it just didn’t feel right in my gut. I have learned to trust my gut for it has rarely been wrong. It’s when I don’t trust my gut and my feelings that I get in trouble.
I felt relieved and peaceful after I made my decision not to do the retreat. When I feel peaceful, it is ways an indication that I am aligned with Spirit. It’s after I make my decision that the peace comes, not before. I have learned that when one door closes, another one opens if it is meant to be and the best thing is that I don’t have to push the door to open. I trust that whatever is to come to me and is mine will come at the perfect and right time.
About a month ago, my dear friend, Donna, called and asked me if I would like to be the speaker at the “Women of Faith” dinner at the Rehoboth Congregational Church. Of course, I said, “Yes.” I am thrilled to be able to share my story and all that God has done in my life. Donna wants to dedicate the dinner to a woman in the congregation who died a few years ago. This woman loved to say “Aloha” and, in fact, gave Donna a booklet called “The Aloha Spirit – The Little Pink Booklet of Aloha.”
What an honor it will be for me to share my personal experience of living “aloha” and to share what the Hawaiians teach about aloha. In the Hawaiian language, aloha stands for much more than just “hello” or “goodbye” or “love.” Its deeper meaning is the “joyful (oha) sharing (alo) of life energy (ha) in the present (alo).”
As you share this energy, you become attuned to the Universal Power that the Hawaiians call mana. And the loving use of this incredible Power is the secret for attaining true health, happiness, prosperity and success. I will be sharing a technique in HI which enhances your power to bless by increasing your personal energy.
I bought a new “Hawaiian dress” at a yard sale about a year ago that has been sitting in my closet that I’ve never worn. God knew I would need it for this talk with the Hawaiian theme. I love how God provides before I even ask.
As I thought about the title and what God wanted me to share with the women, what came to mind was the importance of self-love. Like many of us, I didn’t know how to love myself growing up nor was I encouraged to love myself. In fact, just the opposite was taught. I was scolded for being “selfish” and “conceited” and to focus on other’s needs rather than my own.
It’s been a long journey of self -discovery and healing. Part of the process for me has been identifying old beliefs that no longer served me so that I could become the woman I am today and the woman God created me to be. I know, for sure, that I would not be living in Maui or have met my soul mate, Larry, if I hadn’t identified the belief that I don’t deserve good things in my life.
There were many things I learned (after my divorce of 30 years) while I was without a partner for 15 years. Being single and focusing on myself has been the best thing that could have happened to me. I learned the importance of self-love and to trust God and myself. This is truly what my spiritual journey has been about.
I hope you will join us for the “Women of Faith” dinner. The title of the talk is “The Power of Self-Love to manifest your Deepest Desires.” I will be sharing my story of how I manifested my deepest desires. I would love to meet some of you who faithfully read my blog every week. I look forward to seeing old friends and meeting new friends. I look forward to sharing the love and aloha.
This Easter Sunday was very special to me as it is the 1st year anniversary of my “Awakening.” Last Easter, Larry joined me for the Easter Sunday celebration at Unity Church. I was so touched when he gave me a beautiful flower lei right before the service. I remember during the service, praying, “God, open my heart if Larry is my soul mate.” I was just beginning to have some romantic stirrings towards him after being best friends for 2 years. I believe it was that prayer that awakened me to the reality of love right before my eyes. I also know it wasn’t God’s timing until that very moment that my heart was opened. Although we were best friends and had built our relationship on trust and respect, we each had some inner work to do before we moved to the next level.
I am amazed at all that has happened over the past year because I opened my heart to love. One year later, we are celebrating Easter Sunday service together again and Larry surprised me with a beautiful flower lei. My heart overflowed with joy and gratitude. He not only surprised me with a lei, but he purchased leis for my 2 girlfriends, Kati and Catherine, who were attending the service with us. How much better does it get than this?
As you all know, Larry and I moved in together last week. It was a big step for both of us, giving up our freedom and coming together to build our life together as a couple. For me, it feels like we have been together forever because it’s just flowed with peace, ease and grace. I love him living here and playing together. What a gift at this time in our lives to be together in love.
I asked Larry if he would be open to share with you his experience of our relationship and moving in together. Here is what he wrote:
“Pat and I had been discussing moving in together for some time. I had been living alone for the past 3 years and was very happy in my condo. The thought of moving was not pleasant, even though Pat and I are very compatible, love one another and find much joy in being together. Like most people, I don’t necessarily like change, so it was a big decision for me to make.
Even though I felt some fear, it seemed like the best thing to do. I am learning not to worry and control things, but to allow Spirit to do the work. I am also learning to choose love instead of fear. During this process, I realized how much of my decision making over the years has been fear- based. I often tortured myself with thoughts like, “If I do this, I am afraid this will happen and if I don’t do that, I am afraid that will happen.”
When I finally made the decision that the move was for my highest good and for the good of our relationship, everything seemed to just fall into place. Our mantra or prayer was, Everything will flow with peace, ease and grace. Whenever I felt anxious about the move, Pat reminded me about the mantra and we would say it together. It really worked because “we get what we expect” and I was expecting it to flow with peace, ease and grace.
Here are a couple of examples: I was feeling some concern about who would help me move the furniture and heavy stuff from my condo. I really value the relationship I have with the folks who owned the condo I rented. When I gave them my notice, they were really disappointed that I was leaving. To my surprise, they offered to move me to my new home in Maui Meadows. The move went, as we expected, with peace, ease and grace. Not being a “techie”, I was concerned about setting up my computer and smart TV. They not only moved me in, but helped set up everything up all in one day. Pat has shared in her past blog about finding the beautiful stress-less recliner chair valued at $2000 for $800 delivered to our home. I am now enjoying the recliner every day and I love it.
My spiritual journey is similar to Pat’s and our desire is to be vessels of love in whatever we do & wherever we go. In now living together, we are creating a rhythm that takes compatibility, flexibility and patience. It is a perfect opportunity to develop and deepen our love relationship. It is my spiritual belief that Love is the most powerful energy known to humankind. For me, LOVE IS GOD. I do not allow fear to have any power in my life any more. I bring everything to love because that is where the power is and Love will never fail me. The more that I allow myself to be a vessel of love, the more love comes into my life.
Those of you who follow Pat’s blog realize what an inspiration she is. With her beautiful blue eyes and lovely smile, she lights up the room when she walks in. My nickname for her is “Sparkle.” She has been and always will be an inspiration to me. She has encouraged me to love myself, to be positive and to trust the power of love.
I am settling into my new “home” and am enjoying our free and easy stress- less lifestyle. My heart is full of gratitude for what Love has brought into my life. I am happy and look forward to walking this path of love with Pat as we grow spiritually as a couple and as individuals. We are given many opportunities every day to grow and become more conscious. Sometimes that’s scary, but it’s nice to know someone has my back. I look forward to continuing this journey and welcoming all the opportunities that will arise. “
Thank you God for all the blessings in my life. Thank you Larry for coming into my life and loving me the way you do. My journey has been enriched and deepened because of your love and presence. Although Larry doesn’t see it in the future, who knows, we might even write a book about our “Love Story.”
We all want to be appreciated; it feels good to be appreciated when we have done something nice for someone else. I go out of my way to appreciate others when they have done something nice or been kind to me. I love to compliment others when they have something pretty on or have beautiful eyes.
But, there is a problem when I obsessively look (outside) to others to love, accept and appreciate me. When that happens, I leave myself and lose myself because I want someone to fill the void, instead of me filling it with my own love, acceptance and appreciation. It’s been an interesting week to witness my “old behaviors rearing their ugly head.” Thankfully, I have the tools to come HOME to myself and take my power back.
We all have the power to depreciate or appreciate ourselves. The choice is ours. To depreciate means something has lost its value over the years. To appreciate means its value has increased and we recognize the quality, significance or magnitude of something. I am choosing to appreciate myself and recognize my value.
I shared with Larry, “I’m feeling stressed and I’m tired.” I know that moving is one of the top stressors, especially when combining households and letting go of things that are no longer useful to make room for Larry’s things. I’m also helping Larry get ready to move here and get rid of things he doesn’t need. On top of that, although I have truly enjoyed it, I have had friends staying at my home for the past few months. In addition, I have been preparing for a 4- day retreat which is the weekend before Larry moves in.
Although Larry was attentive and understanding when I shared my stress with him, I didn’t think he was really able to grasp the magnitude of my experience of stress. Perhaps I wanted sympathy, even though I said I wasn’t complaining, just acknowledging my feelings. I felt annoyed with him, which is an indication I am giving my power away. Deep down, I was looking to him to appreciate me and say, “You are doing such a great job and I would be stressed if I were you too.”
Looking to others, no matter how much they want to help or love us cannot and will not fill the “hole in our soul.” It will never be enough. They are not meant to fill us up, so no matter how hard they try, it is futile.
It is only God that can fill the “hole in our soul” because that is how we were created. What I have learned is that I need to give myself the love, acceptance and appreciation that I crave from others. Instead of looking to Larry to appreciate the magnitude of my stress, I needed to appreciate myself. It’s my appreciation that I crave, not the world’s.
When this awareness came to the light while I was praying, it felt like there was a shift inside of me and the stress lifted. I still had all same things to do, but I felt a new freedom inside. What I thought I needed from Larry, I gave to myself. This is what I did to re-focus and come HOME to myself.
- I wrote a list of 50 things that I appreciated about myself. What I appreciate, appreciate
- I listened to my son, Tim’s, visualization on loving, accepting and appreciating ourselves
- I focused on what was good and working in my life
- I increased my daily gratitude
- I forgave myself for giving my power away and leaving myself
- I focused on giving myself pleasure and having fun; i.e. swimming, walking, dancing, snorkeling
- I had a massage
- When I went to bed, I thought about all the things I appreciate about myself.
I depreciate my value and worth when I look to others for my value. I appreciate my value and worth when I give it to myself. Here are some things we do to depreciate ourselves on a daily basis. Which ones can you relate to?
- When we judge ourselves to be “not good enough” or strong enough
- When we say YES when we mean NO
- When we choose fear instead of love
- When we don’t speak our truth and live in integrity
- When we don’t allow ourselves to feel our feelings
- When we want to please others at the expense of ourselves
- When we don’t trust ourselves and our intuition
- When we beat up on ourselves and live from the “shoulds”
- When we try to control others
- When we procrastinate about making important decisions (or small ones)
- When we think we have all the answers and don’t listen to others
- When we don’t pray/meditate and depend on Spirit
- When we don’t take time for ourselves to enjoy life and use our gifts
- When we don’t live in the present moment and worry about the past or the future
- When we don’t know how to relax and just BE
- When we are unable or unwilling to forgive
- When we medicate our feelings through addictions i.e. alcohol, drugs, shopping, busyness, food, gambling, codependency
I am grateful for the daily lessons to grow and live my best life. We must be willing to go within and listen to our souls. We must be willing to change and do whatever we need to do to heal the “hole in our souls.” We have the POWER to change because the POWER is within us to live a magnificent life. I encourage you to live your life to the fullest, because you are worth it. We are not promised tomorrow.
As I sat to mediate this morning, I asked God what He wanted me to write about. I then remembered a beautiful clock that hung on my kitchen wall over 35 years ago. It said, “GOD’S TIMING IS PERFECT.” Little did I know then how true that would be in my life.
I read something that same day that said, “You will get there when you are meant to get there and not a moment sooner. So relax, breathe and be patient.”
It occurred to me that we are always “waiting” for something to happen in our lives: waiting to graduate, waiting to get married, waiting for a house to sell, waiting to meet your soul mate, waiting for a new job, waiting for money, waiting in line at the supermarket or your food to be served in a restaurant, waiting for a baby to be born, waiting to leave a marriage that is dead, waiting for your adult children to leave the nest, waiting for chemo to end or start, waiting to lose weight, waiting to go on vacation, waiting to start a new job and the list goes on and on. Are you waiting for something?
When we are waiting for something to happen, I like to think of it as “being in the hallway of our lives.” It is in this place that we learn to trust. One door may be closed and the other hasn’t opened yet. It can be scary because we don’t know when or what the new door will be when it is opened (or if it will be opened.) We may want to control the outcome and try to make things happen. We may complain, get angry, bang on the door to open or try to make things go our way. This can drive us crazy. I don’t know about you, but I don’t particularly like to wait. I want what I want when I want it and I can be impatient and ask why it’s taking so long for something to manifest. After all, I think I’m doing everything I know how to do to manifest what I want.
The good news for me is that I am learning the art of waiting, being patient, grateful and trusting God’s divine plan to unfold. It feels so good and it truly is living heaven on earth.
I have been in the hallway many times in my life and have learned many things while waiting in the hallway.
I learned to trust God’s timing
I learned to surrender
I learned to trust my intuition
I learned to let go
I learned to be patient
I learned that I’m not in control
I learned to rely on God’s grace in all things
I learned how to BE and relax
I learned that God’s plan is so much better than my plan
I learned to be peaceful and watch things unfold in God’s perfect timing
I learned to love myself
My personal experience has been that it is only when I am ready body, mind and spirit that I change and consequently things change in my life. I need to learn my lessons and they will take as long as I need them to take. I don’t need to rush the process or judge myself that I am doing something wrong. I need to trust that all is in God’s perfect divine timing.
I stayed in a marriage until I was strong enough and confident enough that I could take care of myself and ready to leave. I couldn’t have left one minute earlier than I did. When a flower is ready to bloom, it will bloom. We cannot make it bloom until it is ready. A baby will not be born until it is ready to be born.
So, wherever you are in your life, whatever transition you are in, rejoice, relax and be grateful for God is doing a mighty work in you and transforming you on the inside. You are being prepared for something new.
I was in the “hallway of my life” as I waited for my soul mate to arrive. Was I always patient and trusting? Absolutely not. As I reflect on the last 12 years, I recognize my personal growth and how I had to prepare myself for the love that God had promised me and for the depth of love I would receive and give to my soul mate.
I would like to share a few things that I did to prepare myself for the love of my life: I put God first in my life, I became my own best friend and loved myself to the best of my ability. I spent time alone playing and having fun. I didn’t depend on someone else to make me happy. I made myself happy because I knew happiness was an inside job. I knew what I wanted and didn’t settle for less. I asked for what I wanted and said no when I wanted to. I blessed others when they had what I wanted.
I am in such gratitude that I didn’t give up and continued to BELIEVE in God’s promise. Because I learned to love myself and follow my heart, I’m able to love in a way that I’ve never loved before and be loved like I’ve never been loved before. Now that is good news!
My prayer for you, wherever you are in your life is that you will continue to trust God’s perfect timing and plan for your life. I would love to hear from you how God has or is working in your life.
My primary relationship is with myself. As I learn to love and appreciate myself, I will receive the love and appreciation that I desire from others. I must give it to myself until I am so full and overflowing with love that when I give to another, I will come from a place of love and joy. As I learn to love and accept myself, my energy will vibrate in an uplifting way and, since we are all part of one big energy field, ALL of us are infused and uplifted by me as I learn to love myself.
I love how the Universe works and provides me with everything that I need and in the perfect and right timing. Of course, I love when God provides the big things (like a home on the ocean and my soul mate), but sometimes it’s the small things that get my attention. For example, my workshop, “Loving Yourself is the Key to True Happiness” was yesterday.
Whenever I led a workshop in the past, I always used a chalk board or erasable board to write on as the participants shared. I thought about buying one, but then forgot about it. My friend, Ellen, arrived first and handed me a gift and a card. She said, “Pat, here is your house warming gift that I forgot to bring with me on the day of your house blessing.” I smiled when I opened it and knew why she gave it to me 5 minutes before the workshop started.
It was an address book with an erasable board and pen in the front of the book. I was able to use it during the workshop to write on as the women shared. It was small but perfect and did the job. Talk about delivering what I need when I need it. Thank you God.
It was an amazing and powerful day of sharing, introspection and healing for the women. The oldest woman who attended was 87 and the youngest woman was only 29 years old. What was incredible was that the age differences didn’t matter because they shared openly from their hearts and related to each others struggles regarding loving themselves.
They were each given a handout and asked to identify behaviors that were self-loving and behaviors that weren’t loving to themselves. Some of the common threads were:
*Not knowing what they wanted and being able to ask for it
*Not loving their bodies and accepting all parts of it
*Not being in touch with their feelings and able to express them
What a glorious day as we danced together in the closing circle to “God meant that I should dance.”
Loving Yourself is the Key to True Happiness
Connect with Yourself
Slow down and get quiet enough to listen to your Spirit, God, inner guide, intuition and spend less time listening to other people’s opinions or the loud, critical voice inside your own mind. One of the best practices for cultivating the ability to hear your inner guiding system is meditation. If finding the time to sit quietly is not realistic at the moment, an even simpler life-changing practice is to make daily mundane activities—such as brushing our teeth or standing in line at the grocery store—a time for quiet reflection. In these moments, ask for guidance and listen for some clear answers. When we connect with ourselves, it gives us access to an inner abundance of wisdom and knowledge. This inner source of wisdom will always guide us to our best right actions.
Set an Intention to Be Happy
Despite what we may have been taught, happiness is as simple as just choosing to be happy. When we truly believe that happiness is a choice we will instantly empower ourselves in any situation, whether it’s a relationship, job, or pattern of thinking that’s been creating judgments, worry, doubt, fear, or confusion. The moment we choose to perceive things differently by choosing a loving perception of ourselves, others, and our circumstances, we not only strengthen our capacity to feel happy, we also open ourselves up to limitless possibilities where there once was seemingly no solution. T
This is a lifelong practice, because when we’re not monitoring our thoughts, they have a tendency of veering back into fear and worry. One of the simplest and most profound ways we can align with loving perceptions each day is to practice setting an intention every morning when we wake up. This intention can be very simple: Just say to yourself, I choose happiness—and feel it.
Most of us don’t know what “surrender” means. It’s the opposite of the way many of us operate, which is by attempting to control outcomes and situations and to make things happen. In contrast, surrender occurs when we release our need to control things, and instead choose to place a higher level of trust and faith in a power greater than ourselves and in the process of life.
When we tap into this relaxed energy, we allow that which we desire to flow to us in a miraculous way. The job, relationship, or whatever we are envisioning and desiring for our lives is all on its way—and when we surrender our plans for the time line and the form in which we think it should arrive, we allow an even bigger and better outcome to take place. When we are not fearfully boxing ourselves in, we are able to fearlessly say YES to limitless opportunities for joy to enter our lives.
As I sat down to the blank piece of paper in front of me, I didn’t know what I was going to write about. I prayed and asked God, “Please guide me and help me share what I need to share.”
Last night while sitting on the lanai, with Larry, I turned to him and said, “You are amazing.” He is the most loving, kind, caring, gentle, patient and compassionate man I know. It is clear to me how much he cares and goes out of his way to love and help others. I think this is one of the reasons I fell in love with him.
He turned to me, looked deeply into my eyes and said, “It takes one to know one.” Of course, I’ve heard this before many times, but for some reason, it went straight to my heart and kind of shook me up. Could I really accept that the qualities I see so clearly in him were also in me? Was that why he fell in love with me?
Could I be that loving, kind, caring, gentle, patient and compassionate? It is one thing to think maybe I had these qualities in my head, but to accept them with my heart and embrace and CLAIM them as my own was something very different. I felt excited because I was allowing this truth to penetrate my being and soul. I asked myself, “If I continue to love Larry and see his good qualities, would I continue to love myself and see my good qualities?” That felt really good and I knew that I had received a gift that I wanted to cherish and deepen. If I believed this about myself, my actions and reactions would naturally demonstrate that.
I have heard that what I see in others is also in me, both the light and dark side of ourselves. We truly are mirrors for one another. For most of us, it is easier to see the dark side and the things we don’t like about ourselves than it is to see the light and our magnificence.
I had just finished writing this part of the blog when God didn’t waste any time and gave me the opportunity to see and embrace the dark side of me. This is the human or unhealed part of me that wants to judge, be right, gossip and defend myself.
This didn’t feel quite as good as seeing me as loving, kind and compassionate. But I knew it was a gift and invitation to love all parts of me and ask God to heal me.
The details of what happened don’t matter, what matters is how I moved through it and the tools I used to free myself. First of all, I needed to allow myself to feel my anger at what I “perceived” as wrong doing to me. For much of my life, being a people pleaser, I was out of touch with my anger and just pushed it down, ate over it, or stayed busy over it.
I allowed myself to feel my anger and write about everything I was angry about. I didn’t hold back because I knew it was necessary for my process and transformation. When it felt complete that I had released all of the anger inside of me, I then gave it to God and used a powerful forgiveness tool that I’ve used for years.
I prayed and affirmed, “I have attracted this into my life for my highest good. She is not wrong and I am not right.” There is always some resistance at first when I say this because I want to make someone else wrong that I believe has hurt, disrespected or wronged me. I may have to do it several times until it becomes a part of me and I believe it. I know that whenever I make someone else wrong, (and me right,) I am a victim. I don’t want to live my life as a victim with unforgiveness and resentment in my heart. So it is a choice that I make to free myself and it has never failed me.
I then prayed, “I release judgment and send light and love whenever the thought came up about what was said or done to me.” This is a powerful affirmation and works instantly. I cannot give myself the luxury of ruminating or obsessing about this because it hurts me and keeps me in bondage. It says in scripture. “Be transformed by the renewal of your mind.”
It is amazing how “free” I felt after I did this spiritual work and cleansing. The truth is that, “What other people think about me is none of my business.” My business is to love; to love God first, and myself and others to the best of my ability.
I want my light to shine and to live my life being a loving, kind and compassionate person. I want to accept, love and embrace the light and dark parts of me because if I love myself this way, I am able to love others in the same way.
“Every positive change, every jump to a higher level of energy and awareness invites a rite of passage. Each time we ascend to a higher rung on the ladder of personal evolution, we must go through a period of discomfort, of initiation. I have never found an exception.” Dan Millman
What a week of ups and downs, letting go and trusting God for my highest good and that of my loved ones. I wrote last week that my soul mate had arrived and how wonderful it was to have this man in my life. I was flying high and didn’t expect to plunge into the depth of fear that I did because the honeymoon appeared to be over.
Each time we ascend to a higher rung on the ladder of personal evolution, we must go through a period of discomfort, of initiation.
Larry has had a medical problem for the last 2 years that the doctors have been unable to diagnose. It comes and goes and has responded some to different treatments. This past week, all hell broke loose and his symptoms were severe and worse than ever before. It was very scary watching him suffer and not knowing what to do or what it was from.
I was desperate and called my friend, Carole, in RI and asked her to put Larry on the prayer line. When she called the next person on the prayer line and described Larry’s symptoms, the person was familiar with the symptoms and told Carole what she thought it might be. Carole gave me the information and we googled it. Sure enough, it was almost exactly Larry’s symptoms that the doctors hadn’t been able to diagnose for 2 years. Talk about a prayer being answered immediately. Thank you God.
Larry is now in the process of many positive changes and we are trusting God for healing. People have “showed up” in his life to help him with his diet, essential oils and herbs. Another friend, Mary, who is a healer, did a long distance energy healing with him on the phone. It has been just one week since his symptoms were so severe. I am happy to report that he is 75% better.
We each have our journey of faith to walk, hand- picked by God to help us grow stronger and more dependent on God. I am not exempt from this, for sure. I asked myself, “How does my faith grow and deepen?” I suspect for many of us, it is the trials, challenges that we face each day that deepens our faith.
It is my belief that I attract EVERYTHING into my life for my highest good and that even before I came into this world, God and I made an agreement what I would experience for my soul to grow. This gives me comfort and a willingness to trust God that all is well.
Not only has Larry experienced healing and transformation, but I have too. I have always been strong and been the one that others come to for help. I didn’t feel strong and asked for help. I allowed my friends to be there for me while I was in the depth of my fear. This is not an easy thing to do, allowing myself to be so vulnerable and real. I called my friend, Joseph, in tears because I was so scared. He listened and loved me just as I was. My friend, Sandy, came over my house and when I opened the door, I almost fell into her arms with tears. She hugged me and then sat and held my hand as I allowed myself to feel my feelings. I wanted to be STRONG for Larry and didn’t want to share my fears with him, but I couldn’t help myself when I saw him and fell into his arms and cried.
I knew my fear was coming from a very deep place as I couldn’t stop crying. I had a flashback of my mother dying in front of me when I was 20 years old. I remember feeling so helpless and hopeless as I was unable to save her. I then realized that the fear I was feeling about Larry was fear that I was going to lose him when I just found him.
Now that this is behind me, I feel so blessed and grateful for this experience. I allowed myself to be loved in a very deep, sacred way and I allowed others to love me and SEE the real me. This is a gift to all of us.
On Sunday, I had a celebration and invited my friends to a house blessing at my new home. It was a glorious night and I felt like a “Sparkling Queen” as each person shared their wishes and love for me and my new home. Larry bought me a beautiful lei to celebrate and my friends, Myia and Garrett, made me a lei from their Plumeria tree. I felt so loved and cherished and I thank all my friends for making it so special.
I look forward to a peaceful, exciting, and adventurous week with God. I am grateful this “RIGHT OF PASSAGE” is over.
“For I know the plans I have in mind for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you. Plans to give you a hope and a future. Jeremiah 29-11. For years, this has been my favorite scripture and I have trusted and believed it would come true.
Have you ever waited and prayed for something that seemed like it took years for it to happen? You may even still be waiting. You watched your friend’s prayers being answered while you waited patiently (and sometimes impatiently) for yours to come true. You prayed and prayed, surrendered it to God, did a vision board and still nothing happened? But you didn’t GIVE UP on God’s promise and your dream because in your heart of hearts, you KNEW that someday it would happen. It is my belief that God puts the desires of our heart in our hearts to be fulfilled in God’s perfect timing. What is the desire of your heart?
Many of you already know my story because I have shared in past blogs the desires of my heart. The desire of my heart was to meet my soul mate. I knew deep within that was the reason I followed my heart to Maui. I thought it would happen quickly since I had already been waiting for over a decade.
Maui is an island that couples in love come to so it wasn’t easy watching couples walk hand in hand on the beach every day. I learned to bless them and send them love, trusting my day would come in the perfect and right time.
My day has come and I would like to shout it from the mountain tops. I am so grateful that I waited and trusted in God’s perfect plan and timing. Here is my story:
I met Larry 2 ½ years ago at a dance when I first moved to Maui. It was the first dance that I attended and didn’t know a soul. I liked how Larry looked and danced so I asked him to dance. Being a gal from the east coast, I knew I had to ask the guys to dance if I wanted to dance. I found out that he was from Connecticut so there was some connection, but that was it. When I moved here permanently in Sept. 2012, we started to take walks together and share spiritual truths. Over the 2 years, we became best friends, talked on the phone daily and said, “I love you” to one another. We learned to trust and depend on one another’s love.
All of my friends and children kept asking me, “What is it with Larry?” because all I talked about was spending time with Larry. His friends asked him the same question. We would both just say, “We are just friends.” I didn’t feel any romantic feelings for him and that was fine for both of us because we didn’t want to risk losing the relationship we had.
When I moved a few months ago, Larry was there for me every step of the way supporting and loving me. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for me. I truly don’t know how it happened, other than the anointing of the Holy Spirit, but I noticed some “stirrings” for Larry deep within my soul and I suspected something had shifted in regards to my relationship with Larry.
I was shocked and beside myself, for sure. I didn’t want to tell him because I had made it very clear to him that I wasn’t interested in a romantic relationship and I was scared how this would affect our current friendship.
As I stood in front of the mirror brushing my teeth one morning, I heard God say, “You need to tell him your feelings.” I argued, “I don’t want to tell him my feelings” God said, “You need to tell him your feelings.” I said, “Ok, I will tell him.” I knew God would win out eventually so I gave in and agreed to tell him. We went out to dinner that night and I just couldn’t get it out of my mouth so I didn’t tell him. As I walked to the bathroom, I looked up and noticed a BIG sign on the wall that said, “TRUTH.” I thought, “Yikes, my God is everywhere and I better pay attention.”
The next day, I called Larry and asked him to come over because I was feeling overwhelmed. Of course, he said, “Yes, I will come over.” As he sat across from me on the chair, he said, “So, what you are overwhelmed about?” Here was the moment of truth and I didn’t want to blow it. I took a big gulp and said, “I have a bomb to drop.” He looked at me and said, “Ok, what is it?” I blurted out, “I’m having feelings for you.”
The rest is history. My soul mate has been here for 2 ½ years RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME but neither one of us recognized it. The Holy Spirit opened my mind and heart at the perfect and right timing. Did we both need to do more “inner work” and let go of old beliefs in order for this to happen and for us to be READY for this sacred relationship? I don’t know. All I know is that we are a perfect match and he is all that I prayed for and more. He loves me like I’ve never been loved before and I love him like I’ve never loved before. It truly feels like a match made in heaven.
We love to play, talk, pray, laugh, dance and enjoy the present moment. We bring God into everything and want to be “vessels of love” in this world for the rest of our lives together. We believe God has a plan for us as a couple, but we don’t know what that is yet and that is ok with me. Larry is joining me in RI when I come back in August. I am excited for him to meet my children and for them to meet the man God has brought into my life to love me.
My heart intention for writing this is to inspire YOU to know that God has a plan for your life and that God answers prayers and can be trusted to grant YOU the desires of your heart. Don’t ever give up because Love is waiting for you.
MY LIFE UNFOLDS IN DIVINE ORDER – Daily Word
”In an effort to achieve my goals quickly, I may push and hurry. Perhaps I’m trying to harvest my crop of dreams and intentions before they’ve had the chance to mature. Just as seeds need nourishment and time, divine ideas yield positive results when they unfold in their natural time and order. I align with divine order by putting God first in my thoughts and actions. I affirm: I am immersed in the natural flow of life. Attuned to Spirit, I am open to guidance. I listen, observe, and receive nuances, nudges and intuition. I wait or act as guided, trusting that divine order is unfolding. I reap the awards when I align myself with God and have faith in divine timing. “
As I sat down to write my blog today, I opened my journal and read these words that spoke to my heart. I am not sure what spiritual book I read them from, so I cannot give credit.
“Love is synonymous with God. It is an unfailing and unchanging mine to draw upon. When I allow love to permeate my entire being, it becomes a powerful source driving out any doubt, sadness or fear. My heart fills with the mighty magnetic force of love and I am empowered to do only good and to share only love. My every thought, word and action expresses the love of God in me. Aglow with God’s love, my heart becomes a magnet attracting good from every direction.” Unknown
For years, my daily mantra and prayer has been to be peaceful, to love and to serve. It feels like a miracle when my dreams are manifested. Yes, it is a miracle but I also know my dreams have come true because of my faith, trust, willingness to receive, surrendering, confidence and creativity.
I had a dream to live on the ocean for as long as I can remember. I felt in my heart that it would happen, but I didn’t know HOW – that was up to God. I needed to do some “inner work” and to know that I deserved and was worthy of God’s love and good. I learned to say YES to God’s plan for my life and to wait for God’s perfect timing to unfold. That wasn’t always easy because I felt impatient at times, but kept surrendering to God’s will and love in my heart.
I am still in awe when I sit on my lanai and look out over the ocean because I am now living in a 2 million dollar home. I am humbled and filled with gratitude and joy. This is not to brag by any means, but to inspire you to be open and to receive God’s good in your life.
Many of you have been following me for years and have witnessed my struggles, fears and transformation. I have not held back because I chose to be authentic and show you how I did it so you can do it. I have been stepping out in faith for years BEFORE I had all of the answers or the money or the know how to do something. When you do this, you ALLOW God to take the reigns and provide you with everything you need.
I have a chapter in my book, “Simply a Woman of Faith” about how the money came when I was looking for an editor for my book.
“With the manuscript complete, I needed to find an editor. Prices ranged from sixty dollars an hour to one hundred and twenty five dollars an hour. I had no idea how long it would take to edit my book and how much it would cost. I sensed it would take a while since I had no formal training in writing. I prayed and asked God to lead me to the right editor.
My son, Tim, said to me ,“Mom, you have to change your yard sale mentality when it comes to looking for an editor.” “You’re right Tim, I always want a bargain, but I’m not willing to do that with my book. I want the best editor I can find and I don’t care how much it costs.”
After checking out a few different editors, I called the Book Coach, Lisa Tener. I knew in my heart that I wanted her to edit my book. She also happened to be the most expensive, but she was the best.
Okay God, where’s the money going to come from? This could be very expensive by the time she’s through editing.
I asked for a dream that night. In my dream I was walking up a ladder into the sky. In my spirit, I knew God was saying – The sky’s the limit. I called Lisa the next day and hired her, trusting the money would come. A half hour later, I checked on line for the balance in my checking account. I received my paycheck the day before, but hadn’t looked at it since it goes directly into the bank.
What’s this extra money God? Where did it come from?
When I reached work, I asked about my last paycheck and discovered that I’d received a performance award. In the past, we’d always been informed of our awards at the awards ceremony. When the editing was complete, it turned out that the extra money covered the bill and it was exactly what I needed. My God is full of surprises and loves to shower His blessings on me when I trust Him and step out in faith.”
Moving to Maui was certainly stepping out in faith because I didn’t know what was going to happen or how it would happen. I showed up every day, TRUSTED my inner voice, God, and followed my heart.
When I meet new people in Maui, they often ask me, “What brought you here?” I always respond with “My heart.” My heart knew what I needed. Today, my heart sings and I am full of joy and gratitude that I had the grace to follow my heart. I have manifested love and the desires of my heart. Aglow with God’s love, my heart becomes a magnet attracting good from every direction.
Are you following your heart? Do you know how to follow your heart? Do you know what makes your heart sing? I would be happy to help you manifest the desires of your heart as I have. You deserve to be happy.
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Author, Inspirational Speaker, Spiritual Coach, Retreat Leader & Radio Talk Show Host
Simply A Woman of Faith
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